Church wedding rules. Procedure, order and how long the wedding ceremony takes in the Orthodox Church. Wedding dress of the bride

When two people who truly love each other wish to live their entire lives together, they bind their lives in holy marriage. In the Gospel, the wedding is compared to the mysterious union of Christ with the Church. A wedding is a sacred ceremony of the seven sacraments, the union of two loving souls before the face of the Lord. Previously, church marriage was not given special importance. The main thing was to sign the registry office. But in recent years, more and more young couples have appeared, seeking to connect their lives with sacred ties. The wedding ceremony has certain canons. Consider the rules for weddings in the church.

Why do you need a church wedding

In the spiritual life of every person there is such a thing as faith. Lovers believe that being married in a church, they will definitely meet and will be together again in the Kingdom of Heaven. During a church ceremony, the bride and groom are united by sacred bonds. They take an oath to each other, put all their love and faith in the most important words in life. Their love is blessed. Family life is guarded by God.

Wedding dress of the bride

What should be a wedding dress? The concepts of a wedding dress and a wedding dress are different from each other. At the present time, in the appearance of the bride, they are not treated as strictly as before. But lovers still stick to the rules. When a bride is married in church, her dress should be modest. According to the rules of church traditions, the legs should be completely covered, but a neckline and a beautiful cut on the back are allowed. The color of the wedding dress should be light colors, preferably white. White is a symbol of purity and innocence. It is forbidden for a bride to be married in dark and bright colors. The head must be covered with a veil or light shawl. A hat is allowed. A delicate wreath can decorate the bride's beautiful hairstyle. Before entering the church, the bride's shoulders and arms are covered with a cape. The bride's shoes must be closed. It is believed that getting married in sandals is a bad omen. It has long been believed that a wedding dress should have a long train. The longer the train, the happier your family life will be.

Choosing a wedding day

In order to set a date for a wedding in a church, you must first familiarize yourself with the 2014 wedding calendar. In it you will find out on which days it is allowed to get married and on which not. Auspicious day for the wedding is Sunday. Since basically all couples strive to get married on this day, it is necessary to pre-appoint the time for the ritual. The wedding ceremony is also held on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. On Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday, usually the wedding is not performed. The ritual lasts several hours. Therefore, it is held in the daytime, but not in the late afternoon. The Orthodox Church has both auspicious and "forbidden" days for the wedding. What days are these?

Christmastide;
Eve of the Meeting of the Lord;
Pancake week;
Eve of the Annunciation;
Great post;
Easter;
Day of the Ascension of the Lord;
Day of the Holy Trinity;
Petrov post;
Assumption Fast;
Nativity;
Day of the Exaltation of the Holy Cross;
Christmas post.

Required actions before the wedding

Having appointed a date for the ceremony, the young will have to choose a church where the ritual will be held. The wedding is carried out by appointment after a conversation with the priest. During the conversation, in addition to discussing the wedding date, important questions will be asked to the bride and groom.

What will the priest ask?

whether you are baptized;
have you decided to get married in church voluntarily, out of love;
are you planning to have children;
whether you were previously married or not;
whether you will sign.

The priest's questions must be answered honestly. The bride and groom can also ask about everything that interests the priest. Discuss the nuances that are needed during the wedding, specify how long the wedding will last, whether photography is allowed in the church. Whether or not to receive communion is up to you. If the bride is pregnant, then she must definitely tell about it. You need to make sure whether it is possible for a pregnant woman to get married in a church. Some priests do not marry pregnant women, but many, on the contrary, happily perform this ritual.

What is needed for a wedding

Preparation for the wedding should take place in love, in a good mood. To carry out the ritual, you must:

How is the ceremony

Many couples don't get married right away. They live together for some time, check their relationship. And if they come to a mutual decision to get married in a church, they set a date for the ceremony after the anniversary of their life together. But the bulk of the young decide to sign and get married on the day of the painting. After registering a marriage at the registry office, they arrive at the church in order to legitimize their relationship before God. How is the wedding ceremony going in 2014? Arriving at the temple, accompanied by guests, the newlyweds are waiting for the start of the festive liturgy.

This rite includes two stages:

The Deacon comes out to the young people, holding a tray with wedding rings. The priest hands the lighted wedding candles to the bride and groom. He further invites the newlyweds to exchange wedding rings three times. Prior to this, the priest must consecrate the rings. Three times the bride and groom move the rings on a tray to each other. This ritual is performed as a sign of unity and reciprocity in marriage.

After that, the most interesting thing begins - the climax of the sacraments of the wedding. The priest marks the groom crosswise with a crown. He brings to him the image of Christ the Savior, stuck to his crown, so that he can kiss him. The priest then puts the crown on the groom's head. The same is true for the bride. But the image of the Most Holy Theotokos is stuck to her crown. Because of the fluffy hairstyle or tiara, a crown is not placed on the bride's head, so it is an honor for the witness to hold it. This ritual lasts about 20 minutes. The ritual with crowns is a symbol of the fact that they have become king and queen for each other forever. If one of the newlyweds gets married a second time, then the crown is not placed on the head, but is held over the shoulder. And if he gets married for the third time, then the ceremony is generally carried out without crowns. After the ceremony of laying the crowns, the young people are presented with a cup of wine. The priest says a prayer and illuminates this cup with a cross and presents it to the spouses. They gradually, in three doses, drink this cup. This ceremony symbolizes a common destiny. Further, the newlyweds become one. Then the priest joins the right hands of the young people and circles them three times around the analogion. This means that they will always walk hand in hand through life. The young are brought to the royal doors, where the groom kisses the image of the Savior. And the bride of the Mother of God. Then they must exchange places. Here the groom must kiss the image of the Mother of God, and the bride - the Savior. Further, after the ceremony, in front of the royal doors, the stage of kissing the Cross begins. At this stage, the groom is handed the icon of the Savior, and the bride of the Mother of God. Upon arrival at their home, they will have to hang them over the marriage bed.

At the end of the ceremony, many years are pronounced for the newlyweds and everyone congratulates the married. Guests can give gifts right in the church. After the completion of the sacrament of the wedding, the newlyweds, together with their relatives and friends, go on a wedding walk.

Video: "Wedding in the Cathedral of the Holy Apostles Peter and Paul"

In what cases a wedding is impossible

There are certain rules for weddings. If they are violated, the wedding becomes impossible.

In what cases does a wedding become impossible?

if the wedding of one of the spouses has been three times before;
if the newlyweds are relatives (up to the fourth level);
if one of the young adheres to atheism; - if one of the spouses is not baptized and is not going to be baptized;
if one of the spouses belongs to another religion and is not going to carry out the baptism ceremony;
if one of the spouses is already married;
if the newlyweds have not yet registered their relationship with the state.

We offer you to watch the video, from which you will receive a lot of useful information about the sacrament of the wedding and how to prepare for it.

How much does the wedding cost

The cost of a church wedding depends on the temple in which the newlyweds decided to hold the ceremony. Temples set prices in different ways. There are churches where the price is set indefinitely, that is, how much money the newlyweds can contribute to donate to the temple. In other cases, wedding prices range from 500 to 2000 rubles.

Tell us in the comment about how your wedding ceremony took place. What emotions did you experience during this wonderful ritual. Did you follow all the wedding rules?

A wedding in the Orthodox Church is one of the seven main sacraments and believers try to observe the rules for it as carefully as possible. A wedding, along with baptism, chrismation, repentance, communion, priesthood, and blessing of the oil, constitute the center of spiritual life and embody the fullness of man's entry into church life. You can read everything a bride and groom needs to know before such a responsible step as a wedding in our detailed article. It will also be of interest to those who have already performed the sacrament, but want to learn more about it.

The meaning of a wedding in the Orthodox Church

According to the Christian worldview, two people unite in a union sanctified by God and become one flesh. That is why divorce, so common today in the Christian environment, is considered an unnatural phenomenon, as if a mother decided not to live with her child. Sometimes such a rupture is associated with amputation of a limb or organ - a painful process that makes a person inferior.

The Lord created Adam and Eve and blessed them to multiply and produce the earth. Spiritual and physical kinship with his wife, Adam immediately recognized: first of all, when he saw Eve, he called her his flesh and blood, because he loved her:

“And the man said, Behold, this is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she will be called a wife, for she was taken from her husband ”(Gen. 2:23).

Therefore, before taking this step, people should be aware of the seriousness that they promise God by this act.

Young love, as well as long-awaited love, is characterized by haste and vision of your partner in "pink" tones. The virtues that any person has - since everyone is created in the image of God and inherited perfect features from Him - is perceived by a loving person exaggerated and it seems to him that the object of love is perfect. At the same time, his shortcomings - which everyone also has, since we all have undergone original sin and its consequences in the form of illness, death and passions - seem to be smoothed out and do not lend themselves to rational analysis.

Therefore, in the church, where the young people came to talk with the priest about the upcoming event, one can meet an unexpected reaction of the church minister. So, if the priest observes the charter of the holy fathers and honors traditions, then he will advise lovers to wait at least a year until the wedding, during which you can get to know the person better in different circumstances and experience your feelings in practice.

At the same time, this year is not blessed to live an intimate life. In the case when the young came after the established relationship and confronted the priest with a fact, he explains to them that early sexual intercourse before legal marriage leads to adverse consequences for further relationships and their strength.

After an explanatory conversation, if the young people realized their guilt, the priest invites them to fast for three days, then confess their sins and take communion. On the eve of the wedding, the newlyweds must necessarily commune in order to experience this day as the most important in life - the day when two destinies become one destiny, two souls - one soul and two bodies - one body.

How to prepare for the wedding?

First you need to choose a day, a place for the wedding and notify the priest in advance. At the same time, it must be remembered that not every day of the year in the Orthodox Church it is allowed to carry out this sacrament.

The sacrament of the wedding is not performed on Tuesdays and Thursdays, since these days precede the fast that believers observe on Wednesday and Friday. Also, the sacrament is not performed on Saturday, since Sunday (and the church day begins at 20:00 the day before) is Little Easter, a consecrated day.

Also, you cannot get married on the days of the fasts established by the Ecumenical Councils - these are 4 fasts a year with a total duration of 5-6 months with different frequency.

As a rule, the centuries-old tradition of weddings on Krasnaya Gorka has been established in the Orthodox Church of Russia - this is the name of the holiday on the first Sunday after Easter. This day is called Antipaskha in the church calendar and marks the beginning of the period of nationwide wedding festivities, which took place en masse in Russia at all times.

The sacrament is also not carried out on the eve of single fasting days - for example, September 11, on the feast of the Beheading of John the Baptist; on special days of joy and celebration after Great and Christmas Lent - on Christmastide and Bright Week; before and during the feast of the Exaltation of the Holy Cross.

After choosing the day, it is necessary to start preparing, which, first of all, does not include the external preparation of individual items, the invitation of guests and a plan of events for the celebration - but the internal state of the newlyweds, which consists in preparing for the sacrament of Confession, etc. Both the one and the other sacrament necessarily precede such an important event. After all, the Lord calls the Kingdom of Heaven a wedding feast, and Communion at such a feast on the day of the wedding is a communion of the love of God and strengthening for the entire further joint path through life.

The priest appoints the time of the wedding immediately after the liturgy, which is held every morning. Ideally, if the newlyweds succeed in defending the Liturgy and taking Communion at it directly on the eve of the celebration. After all, it is much more important to spend your energy on contributing to the sacrament than to save them for evening festivities (which it is advisable to avoid and leave guests as early as possible for privacy).

What do you need for a church wedding?

The rules for preparing for a wedding in the Orthodox Church are mainly in the inner awareness and responsibility for this step. In the understanding that there is no turning back and all the difficulties of character, grinding in, disagreements - can now not be a reason for the dissolution of the union that God has sanctified.

This is a serious step, but many today lightly take it, not counting on the strength and strength of feelings. Unfortunately, such people do not understand that after the break of the married union, it will be more difficult to make the next family harmonious and what is available should be protected.

And in the second place, it is necessary to prepare an outfit, documents, items for the sacrament and other things necessary on this day.

What you need for a wedding in the Orthodox Church, list:

Marriage registration certificate. According to the rules established by the Holy Synod, marriages not registered with the registry office cannot be married. Such conditions are dictated primarily by the seriousness of the intentions of the newlyweds, because after the revolution and the collapse of the Russian Empire, the church lost the authority to influence the rights and obligations of the parties, the function of regulating legal relations is now performed by the registry office.
Icons of the Savior and the Mother of God. What icons are needed for a wedding? Any images and salaries will do, but the main thing is that they can be picked up without any problems. This pious tradition used to mean the blessing of parents for marriage and was inherited - from the side of the bride, the icon of the Most Holy Theotokos, and from the side of the groom, the icon of the Savior. The blessing of the parents had a sacred value and was sacredly observed.
Gold wedding rings. Previously, a woman's wedding ring was silver, reminding that in a Christian family a woman is an assistant to her husband and submits to her loving spouse. The husband had a gold ring, which corresponded to the symbolism of the royal metal - like Christ, the husband is obliged to love his wife, who symbolizes the Church. It is the husband who will be responsible for his family before God at the Judgment.
Wedding candles. These can be purchased locally at the temple. They are a symbol of the grace of the Holy Spirit, who invisibly comes and sanctifies.
White circuit board. This can be either an ordinary purchased white towel, or a canvas manually embroidered by the bride (which was often practiced earlier). Can also be purchased locally in the Temple. He is laid on the floor and raised at a certain point in the ordinance process. Plat symbolizes the purity of the thoughts and aspirations of the wedding couple.
Some temples have a fixed amount of sacrament offerings. The cost must be paid before the sacrament, so as not to forget about it after. If there is no fixed fee, then you can leave a voluntary donation after the wedding. It should be remembered that the state does not supply church workers with salaries and their living depends on our donations.
Decent appearance of the wedding couple. The girl (woman) should have a headdress (a scarf or a more magnificent wedding veil), closed shoulders, the outfit should be modest, covering the knees and not having a deep neckline. A man should be wearing trousers. Shorts, breeches, and other shorts that expose legs are not allowed for men in the temple. It is better to choose the color of the dress for the bride in light, pastel colors. Traditionally, a pure chaste girl emphasizes her innocence with a completely white dress and fresh flowers in her hands. It is better to choose shoes for the bride that are comfortable, with flat soles, in order to defend the service without any problems.

After the church has lost its legitimate civilian power to regulate legal matters, witnesses are not required and rather in the nature of a godly tradition. The witnesses were the sureties of the spouses, they knew them well. They invited experienced witnesses who had their own families of witnesses who, in difficult situations, could give good advice.

What rules for weddings in the Orthodox Church do you need to know?

How to prepare for a wedding in the Orthodox Church - the priest who was chosen by the newlyweds to conduct their sacrament will explain in an accessible way. But the general rules remain the same.

A marriage registered by the registry office is a graceless, but not illegal cohabitation. This form is respected by the church and is allowed in the event that a church marriage cannot be completed. And it cannot be done in several cases:

when a civil marriage has been registered more than three times - according to church canons, one cannot marry more than three times;
when one or both spouses do not belong to the Orthodox Church, are not baptized or are not brought voluntarily;
when the actual dissolution of marriage with the previous spouse did not occur: for civil registration, a divorce certificate is required, for church registration - the bishop's blessing to enter into a new marriage;
when the bride and groom are blood or spiritual relationship - including if they are godparents of one person;
the rules for the age of those getting married in the Orthodox Church are limited to the upper threshold of 60 years for a woman and 70 for a man, the lower threshold: 16 years for a girl and 18 for a guy.

During the preparation for the wedding, all controversial points in worldview issues should be discussed so that the sacrament can be performed with a pure heart.

How long does it take to get married in the church - 40-60 minutes.

What to do with wedding candles and other attributes after the wedding?

From such family heirlooms, you can arrange a small collection. For this purpose, a separate box is brought up, where attributes are put after a wedding, baptism and other memorable family events. The box can be shown to children, illuminating in front of them the details of a significant day, refreshing their own memory and plunge into happy events with memories. Various souvenirs brought from the pilgrimage can also be placed there.

Wedding candles can be lit during prayer to ask for something important for the family from God, for special gratitude to Him, or at other times.

All of these things are reminders of important milestones in family development and are part of the emotional life of family members. At the same time, by themselves, they do not carry a sacred value. If for some reason the relics are not needed, they can be disposed of in a special way. Since the objects participated in the holy rite, it is better to burn them - on your own or to transfer them to the church with a request to dispose of the consecrated candles and objects that participated in the sacrament.

Seeing the symbols of the wedding in front of them, spouses can, through memories, find ways in mutual understanding, when difficult moments arise, through tangible evidence of their union, which they entered into before God, the spouses remember the importance of the family hearth and gain new strength to go through life together. hand.

The rules for weddings in the Orthodox Church consist, first of all, of a moral foundation, which consists in purity of intentions, the absence of selfish and dishonorable goals and firm determination to unite with a loved one together. The purpose of such a union is to receive from the Lord the gift of like-mindedness for the Christian life and the upbringing of children. More about the wedding can be found in the book.

Features of the sacrament of church weddings in the Orthodox Church. Choice of date, dress, witnesses.

God brings people together. It is in his power to draw up the whole picture of our fate, "chance" meetings, trials and sorrows
Before the Bolsheviks came to power, our ancestors honored the church canons and were very sensitive to the sacrament of marriage. There could be no question of any cohabitation or civil union, all this was considered a shame and was not welcomed in society
All the scriptures say that man was created by God, that is, He is our father and progenitor, who made all people akin to each other.
So, without his will, blessing and a kind parting word, starting an important business means dooming him in advance to failure. This is probably why our ancestors revered their older family members so much and did not marry without their permission and approval.

The meaning of a wedding in the Orthodox Church?

young people hold candles during the wedding

Even if you consider yourself not a religious person and do not go to churches, you still feel that the wedding is a serious step for the spouses.
The priests say that at the time of the wedding, a young couple lets Jesus Christ into their family. He protects them from adversity and disagreement, strengthens her if both spouses are faithful to each other.
In the face of Holy icons and God, people seal their union, merge together, turn into a single whole
A young couple thus receives the blessing of the Almighty and undertakes to fulfill his commandments
Those who have gone through the sacrament of the wedding note that they felt inspired during the ceremony, even greater intimacy with their loved one

Wedding rules

beautiful couple get married

You should inform the priest about your intention in advance. To consult with him on all issues of concern to the minds of a young couple.
The date of the wedding should not be chosen during fasting.
Christians are crowned if they have been baptized in the church, are not married. Between representatives of different faiths, for example, Muslim, Buddhist, wedding in the Orthodox Church is impossible
Dress for this sacrament is chosen elegant, light colors. For women, a long sleeve, closed shoulders, a back, or the use of a cape that covers them is desirable
Before the ceremony, betrothal is held in the church, when the young are given a period of time for approval in their intention to bind destinies
Photo and video filming of the wedding ceremony in the church is allowed, the main thing is to negotiate this moment in advance with the priest
The wedding is held for those who have reached the age of 18 and registered their marriage at the registry office
It is permissible to carry out the wedding ceremony of a person three times in his entire life, if he is widowed or his marriage was dissolved with the consent of the church
The priest will refuse to conduct the sacrament to close relatives
On the eve of the wedding date, a young couple observes fasting and confesses to the priest

How to prepare for a wedding in the Orthodox Church?

serious faces of the newlyweds during the wedding

Before starting the sacred ordinance for marriage, you should consider and fulfill several points:

choose the right date. The church has its own routine and life, therefore weddings are not held during fasting, holidays
decide on the temple where the wedding will take place
agree with the priest who will conduct the service. This could be your confessor from another church / cathedral
prepare a set for a wedding. By the way, you can buy it ready-made in the church shop.
rings. Some time ago, a young couple brought one gold and one silver rings. The first symbolizes the sun and masculine energy, the second - the Moon, feminine. And the ceremony itself was considered a combination of two creative principles into one for the birth of a new life.
choose an outfit carefully. Usually this is a dress that was worn on the day of marriage registration at the registry office. But many couples come to the desire to get married consciously later. Then another outfit is chosen. For women, long-sleeved, closed-length dresses and a scarf on the head are optimal.
be sure to come to confession and receive communion the day before, observe the required duration of fasting

How to choose the best days for your wedding?

choose the date of the wedding according to the calendar

As noted above, a church or temple has its own routine of life, in which there are days only for prayers and divine services of monks. For example, during fasting, the great holidays known in the world, the wedding ceremony is not performed.

Each temple has its own schedule for the whole year ahead. You can familiarize yourself with it when you come to the priest to agree on a date.

What is needed for a wedding in the Orthodox Church?

icons for wedding

Before the wedding ceremony, a young couple should:

come for an interview with the priest, negotiate the date of the sacrament with him
follow all his instructions regarding fasting
arrange a day for the young couple to come to confession and communion
talk about the engagement - will it be held a few months before the wedding or on the same day it will precede the last

On the day of the sacred ordinance, the young couple prepares:

icons of the Savior and the Virgin Mary, perhaps they are passed on as a relic in one of the families from parents to children
pectoral crosses
rings
special wedding candles. They can be bought locally in the church shop.
towel under feet
towel or cloth for tying hands
handkerchiefs for holding candles and crowns, 4 pieces in total
bread, wine, sweets

In many temples, two more witnesses are also required, who will hold the crowns over the wedding couple and help in the process of performing the sacrament. These people are selected from among baptized Christians who regularly attend church services.

What wedding rings are needed?

wedding rings in a box

More than 10 centuries ago, there was a tradition of engagement on the eve of a wedding. Both of these ordinances were performed only in front of God in the church.
Closer to our time, marriage registration at the registry office began to be considered an engagement. Some couples believe that this act is enough to create a new family, while others do not. They either come to church to get married under the influence of fashion, pressure from parents, personal mutual desire.
According to church canons, wedding rings are different from engagement rings. The second is a symbol of the desire to be reunited in the union of two people. Externally, they can be anything up to expensive options with precious stones.
Wedding rings are more modest and simpler jewelry. On their inner side, our ancestors carved prayers, and we - the date of the wedding and the name of the spouse
Correctly chosen rings - gold to the husband, silver - to the wife. The first personifies Jesus Christ and Divine power, the second - the Church, purity, loving service

How to choose a dress for a wedding in the Orthodox Church?

correct wedding attire of the bride

Perhaps this is the most exciting and sensitive question for every bride. After all, she wants to be the most irresistible and beautiful on her wedding day.

What must be in the bride's attire:

dress or skirt below the knee
closed shoulders, chest, back. For open-cut wedding dresses, take a cape
head covered with a veil, scarf, hat

How is the wedding going in the Orthodox Church?

young couple before the wedding

The sacrament of the wedding begins with the betrothal, if the young couple arrived at the church after the registry office. Liturgy is being held all the time in the church.
Father meets them at the entrance and leads them inside. In this case, the newlyweds are located like this - a man on the right, a woman on the left, and both are turned to face the altar
The deacon brings out the engagement rings on a tray, which were prepared in advance and lay on the altar
The priest makes the sign of the cross over the young couple with the help of lighted wedding candles and hands them over to them. This is a symbol of the meeting of two loving hearts who want to tie their destinies together.
Then the priest invites the young to put on rings, reading special prayers and voicing their intention to get engaged. He blesses each of the couple with the sign of the cross - first a man, then a woman, and he puts on rings for them himself. After the bride and groom exchange rings as a sign of their readiness to share their joys and troubles with each other.
Then the young couple stands on a towel, which means their desire to have one destiny for two. They confirm this three times, answering the father's question, that they did not promise their heart to anyone else.
Prayers are read, the service continues. All those present in the church pray together with the priest for the happiness of the young
Then the crowns are brought out and the priest first makes the sign of the cross over the young and lays them on their heads. The crown may be held over the bride by a witness because of her lush hairstyle.
Father ties the right hands of the young with a towel and leads three times around the lectern
Then the deacon brings wine in a bowl, over which the priest reads prayers and invites the man and woman to drink three times in turn
Putting his right hands together and covering them with his epitrachilia, the priest again leads the young couple in a circle three times. Leads to the golden gate, where they take turns kissing the icons of the Savior and the Mother of God
At the end of the wedding, the priest gives a kissing cross to the husband and wife and presents them with the icons with which they were married. The newlyweds can hang them over their bed to maintain a constant connection with the Almighty.

Duration of the wedding ceremony in the Orthodox Church

young people hold wedding candles in their hands

Different churches have their own rules and canons, which may differ slightly from the general church ones. Therefore, the duration of the wedding ceremony is quoted from 40 minutes to an hour.

What is the cost of a wedding in the Orthodox Church?

As you can imagine, there is a difference in the cost of a wedding in a rural church or a large legal church in the capital. You can find out the exact figure from the priest, to whom you will come the day before to agree on the date and all the nuances. On average, the amount varies from $ 10 to $ 35.

Video: beautiful wedding

Weddings in the Orthodox Church: signs

young people enter the middle of the church for a wedding

Before the wedding ceremony, no one should see the bride's face, not even the groom. For this, a thick veil was used. Nowadays, the bride's face is covered with openwork or more transparent headlights / scarves
After the bride left for the wedding in the house where she lived, the floors were washed so that she would not return home, and her family life was happy
If during the sacrament of the wedding someone dropped the crown, to be a widow
During the ceremony, those who are married should not look into each other's eyes. This promises a short term of love and betrayal.
According to the signs, the rings should be smooth, without stones and inscriptions, so that the life of the young would be smooth and okay.
If the wedding candles crackle violently during the ceremony, the life of the young is difficult.

Wedding ceremony in the Orthodox Church: reviews

happy husband and wife after wedding

Polina and Victor, a young family

We got married a year after the painting in the registry office. We came to this step consciously, regularly attended church services and communicated with the spiritual father. We got permission to film the ceremony. Surprisingly, in the process of watching, we saw that at some point we became similar in appearance to each other. And in everyday life, many acute moments began to be smoothed out. We felt that we were supported by the Higher Forces and given inspiration to overcome all the turns of fate.

Galina and Evgeniy, family with 10 years of experience

We got married right after the painting in the registry office. It was more a tribute to fashion than our conscious decision. We went through a lot of difficulties and trials, we were on the verge of divorce three times. But they stayed together. We believe that God decided to bind us tightly and helped to overcome all the challenges of fate. For this we are immensely grateful to him!

Video: wedding ceremony in the Orthodox Church

Those who want to get married in the Church should know that this is not only a solemn and beautiful ceremony, but also a great responsibility that young spouses take upon themselves. Some people want to "supplement" their wedding ceremony with a wedding, without realizing the seriousness and significance of this ceremony. After all, a wedding is not just a beautiful ceremony and not a tribute to tradition.

Those wishing to get married in a church must necessarily be Christians baptized in Orthodoxy, but also believers, since they need to understand that to dissolve such a marriage on their own or to break the vow of fidelity means committing an unconditional sin.

Before getting married, the bride and groom should prepare themselves spiritually. They must necessarily confess and partake of the sacrament of the Holy Mysteries. Before that, it is advisable to observe a seven- or ten-day fast.

For the wedding, it is necessary to prepare two icons in advance: the Savior and the Mother of God. During the Sacrament of the Wedding, the bride and groom will be blessed with these two icons. Traditionally, these icons were taken from the parental home and thus passed on to future generations.

It is for this reason that parents bring icons to the church ceremony. If, for some reason, the parents are absent for the wedding, the spouses should bring the icons with them.

In addition to icons, the bride and groom need to purchase wedding rings. At the wedding ceremony, the ring symbolizes the eternity and indissolubility of the marriage. A gold ring is purchased for the husband, which, by its brilliance, represents the sunlight, to which the husband is like in the marriage union.

The wife is intended to have a silver ring, which is similar to the moon, a smaller luminary that reflects sunlight, that is, the wife is a reflection of her husband. Nowadays, young people usually purchase rings made of gold or decorated with stones or engraving for both.

You will also need wedding candles for the ceremony. They can be purchased right there in the temple. In addition, you should find a white towel (handbrake) in advance in order to lay it under your feet.

According to custom, the young hold burning candles in their hands. In order not to get smeared with wax, it is worth taking care of white handkerchiefs with which you can protect your hands.
During the wedding ceremony, the young are given a cup of wine. Before the ceremony begins, a bottle of Cahors must be handed over to the priest.

Selection of witnesses

Now the spouses decide for themselves whether they need witnesses at the ceremony.

Witnesses (in other words, guarantors) must necessarily be people baptized in Orthodoxy, preferably church ones, with reverence for the sacrament of the wedding.

Previously, they tried to invite people who were not very young, who understood well what family life meant and, if necessary, who were able to give advice, were tried to be invited. Witnesses must be well acquainted with the bride and groom, because they are vouched for a new family.

During the wedding ceremony, the guarantors hold the crowns over the heads of the bride and groom while the young people walk around the lectern. Also, witnesses with their signatures in the register of births confirm the perfect wedding act.

The sacrament of the wedding

The wedding ceremony consists of the following stages:

engagement;
the wedding ceremony itself;
the permission of the crowns;
thanksgiving prayer.

Betrothal

The first part of the sacrament of the wedding is the betrothal. Betrothal symbolizes that young people, when they marry, make mutual promises and obligations to each other in the presence of God and at his discretion.

Traditionally, the groom should be the first to come to the church and wait for the bride there, but nowadays the newlyweds come together after the marriage was registered at the registry office.

The bride and groom stand in front of the main entrance to the church. At the altar, a priest is already waiting for them, who will conduct the ceremony. The young are led inside the church.

After blessing the young people three times, the priest hands them the candles that have already been lit. With each blessing of the priest, the bride and groom must cross themselves three times. It should be remembered that if the spouses are not married for the first time in the church, but the second or third, candles are not given to the young.

Then the priest puts the rings on the fingers of the bride and groom. After receiving the blessing, the young exchange rings three times as a sign of their love, devotion and willingness to help each other throughout their lives.

The priest's prayer completes the betrothal.

After the betrothal, the bride and groom stand in front of the analogue on a white handbrake, which is spread on the floor. A cross, the Gospel and crowns are laid out on the analogue. The witness stands next to the groom, and the witness next to the bride.

In the face of the Church, the young once again confirm their desire to marry. This consent is the main condition for a natural marriage to be considered concluded. Now the rite of wedding begins - the consecration of matrimony by Divine grace.

The laying of crowns on the bride and groom and their blessing by the priest testify to the sealing of the Sacrament of marriage. The rules of the Church do not clearly indicate whether it is necessary to put crowns on the heads of the young or whether it is enough for witnesses to hold them over their heads.

As a sign of common fate, joys and sorrows, newlyweds are given a cup of wine. It is necessary in turn, first the groom, then the bride, they drink it in three steps.

After the young have drunk the wine, the priest joins the hands of the young and draws them around the lectern three times. Then the newlyweds kiss the icons: the groom is the icon of the Savior, the bride is the image of the Most Holy Theotokos.

The kiss of the newlyweds completes the wedding ceremony. He is a symbol of the chastity and purity of their love.

After that, the gathered relatives and guests can congratulate the young.

In order to get married in the Orthodox Church, one should remember about the existing certain restrictions.

So, for the celebration of the Sacrament of marriage in the Orthodox Church, it is necessary that the young be Christians. If one of the spouses, for example, is a Catholic, then such a marriage will be possible provided that the children born in it will be baptized in the Orthodox Church.

A marriage will not be blessed if one of those entering into marriage is an atheist and agrees to perform the Sacrament of Wedding at the insistence of the spouse.

Also, an obstacle to the wedding is if the groom at the time of marriage is not yet eighteen years old, and the bride has not reached the age of sixteen.

A wedding is not allowed if one of the spouses (and even more so both) is not baptized and is not going to be baptized before the wedding.

You can get married in the Church a maximum of three times.... The Church does not bless the fourth, fifth and subsequent marriages.

The wedding takes place only after the registration of the marriage at the registry office. The Church recognizes civil marriages, but considers them to be devoid of grace.

It is not possible to get married in the Church if at least one of the spouses is legally married to another person. Provided that the previous marriage was also consecrated by the church, it is necessary to take the permission of the bishop for its dissolution and the conclusion of a new marriage.

A wedding, as well as the conclusion of a civil marriage, between blood relatives, as well as relatives acquired during baptism, is unacceptable.

Not a rule, but rather a recommendation. The clothes of the young should be smart. The bride's dress is light in color, arms, shoulders and back should be covered. If the style of the dress is open enough, then you can hide behind a thin cape. All those present at the sacrament of the wedding must wear a pectoral cross.

Temple behavior

While in church, young people, their relatives and friends should adhere to certain rules of behavior:

Women should wear dresses or suits with skirts no higher than the knee. Women are not recommended to wear trousers. Cover your shoulders as well.
Also, women should cover their heads with a scarf or scarf. Makeup does not have to be bright and defiant.
Guests should gather at the church about 15 minutes before the wedding ceremony to avoid crowding when the bride and groom enter.
The sound in mobile phones must be turned off.
You cannot walk around the temple during the wedding ceremony.
During the ceremony, women stand on the left side of the hall and men on the right.
Standing with their backs to the iconostasis is not allowed.
One should be baptized with the right hand.
The wedding lasts about one hour, so if someone cannot endure such a long time, it is better to immediately stay on the street and wait for the ending there.
These rules must be followed by all guests who are present at the wedding ceremony.

Wedding cost

The cost of performing the sacrament of a wedding in an Orthodox church usually differs depending on the city in which the parish is located. The larger the city, the higher the wedding price will be. Accordingly, in small towns the cost will be much lower.

It's not just the size of the city that affects cost. If the young people want to get married separately from other couples who are also married on this day, the cost will be slightly higher. As a rule, there are not very many such people getting married on weekdays. Also, the sacrament will cost more for those couples in which one of the spouses was already married, consecrated by the church.

In order to find out exactly how much the wedding will cost, you should come to the church in advance and find out exactly all the information about the sacrament, the conditions for its implementation and the cost.

Signs associated with the wedding

The sacrament of the wedding is one of the oldest and most important rituals in the life of an Orthodox Christian, so it is not surprising that over time, a large number of signs have appeared that are associated with it.

If the ring fell during the betrothal, then the family will not be strong or the widowhood of one of the spouses.

The handbrake on which the young people stood during the sacrament of the wedding cannot be given to anyone. It should be kept in the family for life, as a symbol of the newlyweds' vital path.

Wedding candles should also be kept with the family for life. But, perhaps, some do not know that they can be re-ignited in case of difficult childbirth or illness of a child.

Before going to church and after the wedding in the house, the young were showered with grain and hops. Now this tradition has undergone changes and the newlyweds are showered with coins to make life rich.

Wedding rings were chosen smooth, without stones, inserts or carvings, so that life in a new family was smooth.

Until the moment when the crown is placed on the bride, her face should be covered with a thick veil, so that no one can see it. At the present time, this custom is rather symbolic, therefore, a transparent or openwork veil is worn.

If, during the sacrament of the wedding, candles crackle in the hands of the bride and groom, then life in the family will not be calm.

During the wedding, the young should not look into each other's eyes, so that family life would not be overshadowed by betrayals.

When the newlyweds returned home after the wedding in the temple, the bridesmaids intertwined her hair.

There are still a lot of similar signs. But, today, the church does not require strict adherence to all the rules. Therefore, following signs or beliefs is a personal matter for everyone.

What days are they not crowned?

According to church rules, it is not allowed to perform the sacrament of a wedding on the following days:

during large and strict four fasts (Veliky, Petrov, Uspensky and Rozhdestvensky);
in Easter and cheese weeks;
in the days between the Nativity of Christ and the Epiphany (Christmastide);
before the great, temple and twelve feasts;
before fasting days (Wednesdays, Fridays, Sundays), that is, the wedding ceremony is not carried out on Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday;
for the day and on the days of strict one-day fasts (Beheading of the head of John the Baptist and the Exaltation of the Cross of the Lord);
also, the sacrament of the wedding is not performed at night.

Exceptions to the established rules can be made only in case of urgent need by the ruling bishop.

In any case, you need to come to church in advance and clarify whether it is possible to get married on the day you are interested in, since a large number of holidays and fasts do not have a fixed date, but change every year.

If the wedding was held on one of the days prohibited by the church charter, the marriage will still be considered valid.

Photo and video filming during a wedding in an Orthodox church

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Then the Epistle to the Ephesians of the holy Apostle Paul is read (), where the marriage union is likened to the union of Christ and the Church, for which the Savior who loved her gave Himself up. The husband's love for his wife is a semblance of Christ's love for the Church, and the wife's loving-humble obedience to her husband is a semblance of the Church's relationship to Christ.This is mutual love until self-denial, the willingness to sacrifice oneself in the image of Christ, who gave Himself to be crucified for sinful people, and in the image true followers of Him, who, through suffering and martyrdom, have confirmed their faithfulness and love for the Lord.

The last saying of the apostle: let the wife fear her husband - calls not to the fear of the weak in front of the strong, not to the fear of a slave in relation to the master, but to the fear of saddening a loving person, disrupting the unity of souls and bodies. The same fear of losing love, and therefore the presence of God in family life, should be experienced by a husband whose head is Christ. In another epistle, the Apostle Paul says: The wife has no power over her body, but the husband; likewise, the husband has no power over his own body, but the wife. Do not shy away from each other, perhaps by agreement, for a while, for exercise in fasting and prayer, and then be together again, so that Satan does not tempt you with your intemperance ().

Husband and wife are members of the Church and, being particles of the fullness of the Church, are equal to each other, obeying the Lord Jesus Christ.

After the Apostle, the Gospel of John is read (). It preaches the good news of God's blessing of the conjugal union and its sanctification. The miracle of the transformation of water into wine by the Savior typified the action of the grace of the sacrament, by which earthly conjugal love rises to heavenly love, which unites souls in the Lord. The saint says about the moral change necessary for this, “The marriage is honest and the bed is immaculate, for Christ blessed them in Cana at marriage, eating food in the flesh and turning the water into wine, showing this first miracle so that you, the soul, would change” (Great canon, in Russian translation, troparion 4, ode 9).

After reading the Gospel, a short petition for the newlyweds and a prayer of the priest are pronounced on behalf of the Church, in which we pray to the Lord that He will preserve those who are united in peace and like-mindedness, that their marriage is honest, their bed is not foul, cohabitation blameless, so that he may make them live until old age when fulfilling His commandments from a pure heart.

The priest proclaims: "And vouch for us, Vladyka, with boldness and without condemnation, call upon Thee, Heavenly God the Father, and speak ...". And the newlyweds, together with all those present, sing the prayer "Our Father", the foundation and crown of all prayers, commanded to us by the Savior Himself.

In the lips of those who are married, she expresses her determination to serve the Lord with her small church, so that through them on earth, His will be fulfilled and reigned in their family life. As a sign of submission and devotion to the Lord, they bow their heads under the crowns.

After the Lord's prayer, the priest glorifies the Kingdom, the power and glory of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit, and, teaching the world, commands us to bow our heads before God, as before the King and Lord, and at the same time before our Father. Then a cup of red wine is brought, or rather, a cup of communion, and the priest blesses it for mutual communion between husband and wife. Wine at the wedding is served as a sign of joy and joy, recalling the miraculous transformation of water into wine, accomplished by Jesus Christ in Cana of Galilee.

The priest gives the young couple three times to drink wine from the common cup - first to the husband, as the head of the family, then to the wife. Usually wine is sipped in three small sips: first the husband, then the wife.

Having taught the common cup, the priest joins the husband's right hand with the wife's right hand, covers their hands with the epitrakhil and puts his hand on top of it.This means that through the priest's hand the husband receives a wife from the Church itself, which unites them in Christ forever. The priest leads the newlyweds around the lectern three times.

At the first circumambulation, the troparion "Isaiah, rejoice ..." is sung, in which the sacrament of the incarnation of the Son of God Emmanuel from the Unmarried Mary is glorified.

At the second circumambulation, the troparion of the Holy Martyr is sung. Crowned with crowns, as conquerors of earthly passions, they represent the image of the spiritual marriage of a believing soul with the Lord.

Finally, in the third troparion, which is sung during the last round of the analogion, Christ is glorified as the joy and glory of the newlyweds, their hope in all circumstances of life: “Glory to Thee, Christ God, the praise of the apostles, the joy of martyrs, their preaching. Trinity Consubstantial ”.

This circular walk means the eternal procession that began on this day for this couple. Their marriage will be an eternal procession hand in hand, a continuation and manifestation of the sacrament performed today. Remembering the common cross laid on them today, “bearing each other's burdens,” they will always be filled with the gracious joy of this day. At the end of the solemn procession, the priest removes the crowns from the spouses, greeting them with words filled with patriarchal simplicity and therefore especially solemn:

"Exalted, bridegroom, like Abraham, and blessing like Isaac, and multiplying like Jacob, walk in peace and do the commandments of God in righteousness."

"And you, bride, have exalted like Sarah, and rejoiced like Rebekah, and multiplied like Rachel, rejoicing in your husband, keeping the limits of the law, because God is so pleased."

Then, in two subsequent prayers, the priest asks the Lord, who blessed the marriage in Cana of Galilee, to accept the crowns of newlyweds as undefiled and blameless in His Kingdom. In the second prayer, recited by the priest, with bowing of the heads of the newlyweds, these petitions are sealed with the name of the Most Holy Trinity and a priestly blessing. At the end of her, the newlyweds with a chaste kiss testify to holy and pure love for each other.

Further, according to custom, the newlyweds are brought to the royal doors, where the groom kisses the icon of the Savior, and the bride - the image of the Mother of God; then they change places and are applied accordingly: the groom - to the icon of the Mother of God, and the bride - to the icon of the Savior. Here, the priest gives them a kissing cross and gives them two icons: the groom - the image of the Savior, the bride - the image of the Most Holy Theotokos.

What should be a wedding meal

The Sacrament of marriage is celebrated solemnly and joyfully. From a multitude of people: relatives, friends and acquaintances - from the sparkle of candles, from church singing, somehow involuntarily it becomes festive and cheerful in the soul.

After the wedding, young people, parents, witnesses, guests continue the holiday at the table.

But how indecently some of the invitees sometimes behave at the same time. They often revel here, utter shameless speeches, sing immodest songs, and dance wildly. Such behavior would be shameful even for a pagan, “ignorant of God and His Christ,” and not only for us Christians. The Holy Church warns against such behavior. Canon 53 of the Laodicean Council says: “It is not appropriate for marriages (that is, even for the relatives of the bride and groom and guests) to ride or dance, but modestly have supper and dinner, as it should be for Christians.” The wedding feast should be modest and quiet, should be averse to all intemperance and indecency. Such a quiet and modest feast will be blessed by the Lord Himself, who sanctified the marriage in Cana of Galilee with His presence and the performance of the first miracle.

What Can Hinder Christian Marriage

Often, those preparing for the wedding first register their civil marriage at the registry office. The Orthodox Church considers civil marriage to be devoid of grace, but as a fact it recognizes and does not consider it illegal fornication. Nevertheless, the conditions for entering into a marriage under civil law and according to church canons differ. However, not every civil marriage can be consecrated in the church.

The Church does not allow marriage more than three times. According to civil law, the fourth and fifth marriages are allowed, which the Church does not bless.

A marriage is not blessed if one of the spouses (and even more so both) declares himself an atheist and says that he came to the wedding only at the insistence of his spouse or parents.

A wedding is not allowed if at least one of the spouses is unbaptized and is not going to be baptized before the wedding.

A wedding is impossible if one of the future spouses is actually married to another person. First, you need to dissolve your civil marriage, and if the marriage was a church marriage, you must take the bishop's permission to dissolve it and bless you to enter into a new marriage.

Another obstacle to marriage is the consanguinity of the bride and groom and the spiritual kinship acquired through baptismal acceptance.

When the wedding is not performed

According to the canonical rules, it is not allowed to have a wedding during all four fasts, on cheese week, Easter week, in the period from the Nativity of Christ to the Epiphany (Christmastide). According to pious custom, it is not customary to marry on Saturday, as well as on the eve of the twelve, great and temple holidays, so that the pre-holiday evening does not pass in noisy fun and entertainment. In addition, in the Russian Orthodox Church, marriage is not performed on Tuesdays and Thursdays (on the eve of fast days - Wednesday and Friday), on the eve and on the days of the Beheading of John the Baptist (August 29 / September 11) and the Exaltation of the Holy Cross (September 14/27). Exceptions to these rules can be made if need be only by the ruling bishop.
Cm. .