Systemic vector psychology about apathy. How to reach your dream? How to move on when life goes downhill

Hello. I am 26 years old, no education. My life is heading for the abyss. I lose willpower and interest in life.

Recently, a girl with whom I was together for 12 years left. I love her very much. They started dating at the age of 14 and almost without breaks. I wanted to start a family with her, have children.

Our town is Russian, but the country speaks Lithuanian. We are both Russians, we studied in the same Russian school. I'm not a stupid guy, but I didn't get on with the Lithuanian language from the 1st grade. In the first grade, the teacher insulted me and called me stupid and humiliated me in every way, because I could not understand the Lithuanian language. After that, I became closed and timid, I generally stopped understanding all subjects, but after the 1st grade I was transferred to another school with a very good teacher who tried to get me up to the 5th grade and she succeeded. But with Lithuanian, I still had a stupor. Although there was foreign language German, I began to learn it from the 4th grade and understood it well, a year later I began to speak it as if it were my native language. Everything else got better and better. By the end of school (we have 12 classes), my classmates spoke the state (Lithuanian) fluently, since it is necessary for entering universities, and I could not do anything at all, although I understood that without it I would be nowhere. But due to the fact that I had good marks in other subjects, I managed to enter the university as a mechanical engineer. I studied for a year, I missed a lot because I didn’t want to go there, because it was difficult for me to write down in Lithuanian, that nothing was clear. I was expelled and I immediately submitted a new application with my girlfriend (she is a year younger than me, so the second time they entered together) for admission and entered aeronautical engineering, on a semi-paid basis. I was taken by exact sciences I didn’t have any problems, I grasp everything quite well, but where I had to write and there was Lithuanian grammar, everything was hell for me. But I sometimes copied, so that at least the teacher could understand what I was writing about. We studied in the capital, but lived separately. She's in a hostel, I rented a room. The girl told me that I needed to learn Lithuanian, but I brushed it off, although I knew what I needed. I was waiting for someone to kick or help from her, but she told me that she tried to somehow force me and prosla and began to communicate with me in Lithuanian, nothing came of it and she said that I had a very difficult character. As a result, I flew out of the university, after a year and a half I sat at home and could not do anything and tell my parents too, they left for another country to earn money for my studies and provide for me. Although from the very beginning I wanted to earn money and study on my own, my parents categorically forbade me and made scandals for me if I started looking for a job. As a result, after I flew out, I just sat at home, each time waiting for my girlfriend in hometown for the weekend, we went out for a walk, but all our friends began to disappear. I understand because of me that she gave me a lot of time. I closed myself in and all the days before the arrival of my girlfriend, I watched films and played computer games, in short, I hammered my head so as not to think about the problem that I flew out of the university, I have no job, I was very afraid to tell my parents.
But then I finished the welder's course, I had acquaintances, but I never made any friends.
And the old ones don’t care about me, everyone already has families and their own affairs, and no one cared about me, except for my girlfriend.
As a result, I began to look for a job in the capital, but they took me only with work experience. There was nothing useful. I lived in a hostel with a girl.
She graduated from the bachelor's degree and entered the university for a master's degree, and I remained without education.
She went out with her classmates, but I was kind of superfluous.
As a result, I went to another country to my parents, to work and try to realize myself, I less than a year abroad, but he came to the girl for the holidays, saw each other 4 times in 8 months, every week.
I work, but I get mine, but at least I can afford something.
And now, before the girl was supposed to defend the deployment, she had stress and we had a fight over some little thing, and it so happened that we didn’t communicate for 2 weeks. I didn't want to distract her and annoy her before the defense.
Then she defended, she appeared very good job, she came to her very good friend and they walked, drank and reveled, but they didn’t even remember me. I wrote to her, congratulated her and decided to chat. To which I heard that she no longer wants a relationship with me, 12 years is a lot and it all needs to be stopped, that this cannot continue. But we had plans that she would come to me and we would start life here in another country. She still wants to move in, but to her friend. Started going to clubs and hanging out in different places, she puts all her pictures on the social network so that I can see it all.
Thus, she shows how good she is without me and that she is very cool now, and I am the one who always supported her, cared when there were difficult situations in her life, with her parents, when we lived in my apartment, in our hometown, when I made all the conditions for her to study at the university, she became unnecessary. She fought with me for 4 years, that she is cool and all so independent and turned my masculine nature into a woman, when there were litters, I was hysterical like a woman.
In short, I invested so much labor of love and everything else in her, but in the end they told me so far and now she is still trying to finish off by the fact that she is independent and beautiful, she puts everything on the Internet so that she specifically knows that after a week of separation she is already walking in full, that they say I was a hindrance to her.
Why so with me? I am reliable, I never betrayed her, she was always happy with me, and now I get only slaps from her.
My world is destroyed, the only one whom I trusted, loved, told me so far. For what?
What will we do?
As I was 4 years in depression, and remained.
And now I don't know how to live at all.
I feel like something. I was betrayed, used and thrown out. I am alone, without purpose and faith in people.

I haven’t written much yet, there are no specifics. But that's all I can now, my head is a mess. Heart ache. Soul whines. Cats scratch.

There are no friends. With parents to say this, you can immediately go to the coffin. It is impossible with them, I grew up on my own and educated myself. They have a bunch of psychological disorders, they are worse than children.

Now I distract myself after work with all sorts of videos and rubbish, so as not to feel the world around me, this wild pain. Most of the money goes to pay own apartment in my country.

What do i do? Help, so you want to live happy? And not to think that if you disappear now, then you were born in vain, because no one cares about me!

I lie to everyone around me. I have a lot of lies. I tell you something that was not there, but I really want to. I lie about my education that I have completed my studies and will soon receive a diploma.

In fact, I'm not stupid, but there is no willpower at all. I can't do what I need to do. I don't remember where it started. Maybe because I didn't graduate from university. When I take on a task, I can’t bring it to the end, I don’t have enough strength, I’m afraid that I won’t be able to.

Now in a country where they speak English. I speak English very badly. Finding friends is not realistic.

How to get on your feet, how to get rid of your psychological problems?
How to become a man? Want to be a good man? Reliable, necessary, strong spirit.

I'm still a coward. I seem confident from the outside and very strong, so to speak, with a core inside and not physically destrofic. But in the distance I will be blown away because of any problem. The last fight was 15 years ago. But 6 years ago I was beaten by a gopnik in front of my girlfriend. Although I am not a nurse and started to fight back, I was knocked out due to the surprise of the attack. Often a girl drove me to a state of madness to see what kind of rampage I was. Of course, my strength is not measured, but I don’t understand why it was necessary to do this. But I never beat the girl and did not cause physical pain.

Often considers apathy in situations when it comes to the sound vector. This is indeed a special conversation. But this does not mean at all that such states are typical only for sound engineers: the state "I do not want anything" can appear in almost every person. Today we will talk about what to do if suddenly your life has gone downhill, if it seems that there is nothing more to desire and nothing more to strive for.

In childhood, each of us imagines our future in one way or another. We usually see it in bright colors: I will grow up, finish school, university, do what I love, earn money, get married or get married, have children, and then grandchildren, become an old grandfather or old grandmother and die. In childhood, we certainly think about the future with the stereotypes of society. So it is accepted - it means that I will have it too. And, of course, many of us, looking at the troubles of others, think: “That definitely can’t happen to me. Everything will be fine and wonderful for me.” until one day something happens that pushes us into the pit of life. We walked and walked up and suddenly find ourselves at the very bottom and, worst of all, stop floundering at all and strive for something in order to get out of this hole.

Systemically vector psychology: apathy

Apathy, says Systemic Vector Psychology, appears when we constantly do not get the satisfaction of our desires. They wanted to earn a lot, but over and over again they stuffed themselves with bumps: they did it, they did it, and nothing came of it. They dreamed of a family and children, but life decreed that there were completely “not those” women who cheated, abandoned, and did not want to get married at all. Dreamed, aspired, did, but nothing came of it.

Systemic vector psychology in examples

At school, Alina always studied very well. She was a kind and sociable person. Like many girls, she had her own dreams and desires. Alina dreamed of becoming a programmer: she felt that this specialty was created just for her. The end of school was nearing. And this meant that her dream - to enroll in computer science - was about to come true.

But fate decreed otherwise. When they applied to the university, Alina did not go to the budget: all the places went to beneficiaries. It's a shame, annoyed, but the girl was in no hurry to become limp: it didn't work out here, so we'll try to go in a roundabout way. And this path was found - at the university there was new specialty"Physicist-informatics", where the curriculum largely coincided with "Informatics". Physics is physics - and Alina successfully entered this specialty.

However, I didn’t have to rejoice for a long time ... You know, almost every, probably, faculty has such a professor who scares newcomers: the smartest, most strict, most difficult, most demanding, the one who brings down exams and the one who quits universities . Alina was unlucky: at the first-year exams, she got just such a teacher: a luminary of physics who believes that only God knows physics better than him, so students should also know physics perfectly.

Alina did not really like physics: more precisely, she did not understand. In the exam with the famous scary professor, she failed miserably. And then she chose to leave the institute, but if only she would never meet this type again.

Systemic vector psychology: apathy in examples

From that moment on, everything began to fall apart. I tried to re-enter another university and study again - I quit again. I wanted to get a job, but nothing came of it either. As a result, the girl sat down at home in front of the computer, began to drink, got a job for a penny in a simple place. Dreams, dreams, where is your sweetness? Alina with such large quantity desires and ambitions in a short period of time changed beyond recognition: she got fat, became lazy, works at half strength, and drinks to the point of insanity on weekends. Steals money from home and lies. Relatives and friends who want to help her, does not perceive at all. Where are the desires? Where are the aspirations? Everything is gone...

Systemic vector psychology in examples: comments

What happened to Alina? Systemic vector psychology claims that the direction of our desires is set, first of all, by the lower vectors. Our heroine, apparently, has a skin-anal ligament, like many people of our time. The anal vector, on the one hand, sets the desire to study hard, to try, to bring what has been started to the end. On the other hand, the skin vector gives ambition, the desire to work and earn.

At the beginning of the story, we see quite successful person just starting out on their journey. But we also see that all attempts to do something and even one iota to move towards the desired result end in failure.

People with an anal vector, as Systemic Vector Psychology shows, are hostages of the first experience. They often fixate on negative states. The professor failed in the exam - now it seems that they will fail everywhere and everywhere. On the other hand, for every person with an anal vector, it is very important to bring everything to the point, to its logical conclusion. When the anal is unable to do this, he experiences terrible discomfort: up to superstress.

Systemic Vector Psychology draws attention to the fact that very often, when people with the anal-cutaneous ligament of the vector are not developed harmoniously, certain problems begin. Systemic vector psychology says that by their nature, the anal and skin vectors are opposite to each other: they have opposite properties. And if, with proper development, these two vectors complement each other, then with improper development, one can interfere with the other. It is these people who are unable to bring anything to the end: they take on one thing, another, a third and throw it halfway.

Systemic Vector Psychology: Desirelessness

Our heroine had a certain desire, a dream - whatever you want to call it, but due to the underdevelopment of the properties of vectors, she could not achieve what she wanted. Over and over again, she filled herself with bumps, sinking deeper and deeper from her failures into bad states. I can’t study, they don’t take me where I want to work ... all hopes and dreams gradually begin to crumble.
Systemic vector psychology emphasizes that apathy, as a state, is characteristic only for an adult. Children have not yet formed the psyche and everything happens a little differently. In adulthood, we do not get the fulfillment of our desires, we fill bumps over and over again and, in the end, in order to cope with the psychological burden, the brain finds a way out: in order not to suffer, you just need to not want anything. As a result, our hands instantly drop: we don’t want anything else from this life.
And when you don’t want anything, then there is nowhere to move: lie down and die. House, computer, alcohol… nothing else is needed. Laziness appears, which Systemic Vector Psychology defines as a manifestation of the energy of mortido - the energy of decay, the desire for the extinction of vital activity, immobility. In people with an anal vector, laziness is often the result of resentment towards the world: the world is unfair, so I will lie on the couch and do nothing. Laziness is followed by apathy.
Relatives with their desire to help and get you out of a bad state seem to be some annoying flies. Why is it all? I just don't want anything anymore, I don't need anything.

Systemic Vector Psychology: The Secret of Apathy

Systemic vector psychology: fighting apathy

How can you help such a person? How to make him want to live, move, achieve goals again? How to bring him out of apathy? The answer is given by Systemic Vector Psychology.
One must firmly understand oneself: apathy will not disappear by itself. If she has come, then it is in vain to wait for a year or two to pass and the person will suddenly awaken to life. Will not wake up if nothing in his world changes. To get out of apathy, you need to start desiring something again. But how to awaken desires in yourself?
It will not work to bring a person out of apathy without his desire. Under a lying stone, as they say, water does not go. Especially if the impetus for apathy was the numerous pokes received from life, and resentment against the world. Pulling a person, trying to inspire him to exploits, reasoning with him with arguments or conversations will also fail. He just won't hear you.
He himself must overcome apathy. After all, this is a real struggle: to live and move despite the complete absence of desires, not to spare yourself and your strengths. Systemic vector psychology shows that the states of the psyche in vectors are easily explainable and natural, so if you realize yourself, the nature of your negative states, it will become obvious what to do in order to return to life again. A person, realizing himself, finds this path himself, because. this path is individual for each specific case.
If there were a magic wand, the wave of which suddenly awakens the desire for life, it would have been put into practice long ago. So far, in my experience, only Systemic Vector Psychology has successfully dealt with such difficult conditions. It is enough to watch video reviews of living people who have completed the training and achieved certain results. But many of them coped with very difficult conditions.

Systemic vector psychology: overcome apathy

If you want to help your relative cope with apathy, I think not. the best remedy than to introduce him to Systemic Vector Psychology: let him read articles on topics of interest on the portal, attend free lectures, ask them his question, or maybe pass full course training! I think this is the fastest and most efficient way.
We live because our desires live in us. Desire is the main driver of a person that makes us get up from the sofas and go to great things. After all, we all live on the principle of receiving pleasure, and pleasure comes only when we satisfy our shortcomings. If there is no desire, then there is no need to get up. No desire, no life. And apathy is, first of all, a rejection of life. Then you have to look for pleasure in other ways - to seize, drink, and so on.

“That definitely can’t happen to me. Everything will be fine and wonderful for me, ”until one day something happens that pushes us into the pit of life ...

Systemic vector psychology often considers apathy in situations when it comes to the sound vector. This is indeed a special conversation. But this does not mean at all that such states are typical only for sound engineers: the state “I don’t want anything” can appear in almost every person. Today we will talk about what to do if suddenly your life has gone downhill, if it seems that there is nothing more to desire and nothing more to strive for.

In childhood, each of us imagines our future in one way or another. Usually we see it in bright colors: I will grow up, finish school, university, do what I love, earn money, get married or get married, have children, and then grandchildren, become an old grandfather or old grandmother and die. In childhood, we certainly think about the future with the stereotypes of society. So it is accepted - it means that I will have it too. And, of course, many of us, looking at the troubles of others, think: “This definitely cannot happen to me. Everything will be fine and wonderful for me, ”until one day something happens that pushes us into the pit of life. We walked and walked up and suddenly find ourselves at the very bottom and, worst of all, stop floundering at all and strive for something in order to get out of this hole.

Apathy, according to Systemic Vector Psychology, appears when we constantly do not get the satisfaction of our desires. They wanted to earn a lot, but over and over again they stuffed themselves with bumps: they did it, they did it, and nothing came of it. They dreamed of a family and children, but life decreed that there were completely “not those” women who cheated, abandoned, and did not want to get married at all. Dreamed, aspired, did, but nothing came of it.

Systemic vector psychology in examples

But fate decreed otherwise. When they applied to the university, Alina did not go to the budget: all the places went to beneficiaries. It's a shame, annoyed, but the girl was in no hurry to become limp: it didn't work out here, so we'll try to go in a roundabout way. And this path was found - the university had a new specialty "Physicist-informatics", where the curriculum largely coincided with "Informatics". Physics is physics - and Alina successfully entered this specialty.

From that moment on, everything began to fall apart. I tried to re-enter another university and study again - I quit again. I wanted to get a job, but nothing came of it either. As a result, the girl sat down at home in front of the computer, began to drink, got a job for a penny in a simple place. Dreams, dreams, where is your sweetness? Alina, with so many desires and ambitions, has changed beyond recognition in a short period of time: she has grown fat, has become lazy, works at half strength, and drinks to the point of insanity on weekends. Steals money from home and lies. Relatives and friends who want to help her, does not perceive at all. Where are the desires? Where are the aspirations? Everything is gone...

Systemic vector psychology in examples: comments

At the beginning of the story, we see a completely successful person who is just starting his journey. But we also see that all attempts to do something and even one iota to move towards the desired result end in failure.

Systemic vector psychology draws attention to the fact that very often, when vectors are not developed harmoniously in people with an anal-cutaneous ligament, certain problems begin. Systemic vector psychology says that by their nature, the anal and skin vectors are opposite to each other: they have opposite properties. And if, with proper development, these two vectors complement each other, then with improper development, one can interfere with the other. It is these people who are unable to bring anything to the end: they take on one thing, another, a third and throw it halfway.

And when you don’t want anything, then there is nowhere to move: lie down and die. House, computer, alcohol… nothing else is needed. Laziness appears, which Systemic Vector Psychology defines as a manifestation of the energy of mortido - the energy of decay, the desire for the extinction of vital activity, immobility. In people with an anal vector, laziness is often the result of resentment towards the world: the world is unfair, so I will lie on the couch and do nothing. Laziness is followed by apathy. Relatives with their desire to help and get you out of a bad state seem to be some kind of annoying flies. Why is it all? I just don't want anything anymore, I don't need anything.

Systemic vector psychology: fighting apathy

How can you help such a person? How to make him want to live, move, achieve goals again? How to bring him out of apathy? The answer is given by Systemic Vector Psychology.

One must firmly understand oneself: apathy will not disappear by itself. If she has come, then it is in vain to wait for a year or two to pass and the person will suddenly awaken to life. Will not wake up if nothing in his world changes. To get out of apathy, you need to start desiring something again. But how to awaken desires in yourself?

It will not work to bring a person out of apathy without his desire. Under a lying stone, as they say, water does not go. Especially if the impetus for apathy was the numerous pokes received from life, and resentment against the world. Pulling a person, trying to inspire him to exploits, reasoning with him with arguments or conversations will also fail. He just won't hear you. He himself must overcome apathy. After all, this is a real struggle: to live and move despite the complete absence of desires, not to spare yourself and your strengths. Systemic vector psychology shows that the states of the psyche in vectors are easily explainable and natural, so if you realize yourself, the nature of your negative states, it will become obvious what to do in order to return to life again. A person, realizing himself, finds this path himself, because. this path is individual for each specific case.

If there were a magic wand, the wave of which suddenly awakens the desire for life, it would have been put into practice long ago. So far, in my experience, only Systemic Vector Psychology has successfully dealt with such difficult conditions. It is enough to watch video reviews of living people who have completed the training and achieved certain results. But many of them coped with very difficult conditions.

If you want to help your relative cope with apathy, it seems to me that there is no better way than to introduce him to Systemic Vector Psychology: let him read articles on topics of interest on the portal, attend free lectures, ask them your question, or maybe take a full course training! I think this is the fastest and most efficient way.

We live because our desires live in us. Desire is the main driver of a person that makes us get up from the sofas and go to great things. After all, we all live on the principle of receiving pleasure, and pleasure comes only when we satisfy our shortcomings. If there is no desire, then there is no need to get up. No desire, no life. And apathy is, first of all, a rejection of life. Then you have to look for pleasure in other ways - to seize, drink, and so on.

The article was written based on the materials of the training " System-Vector Psychology»

“Just a little more, and everything will work out, this time for sure!” - I thought

“And the result depends entirely on you?” came an inner voice.

“Shut up, I’ve been going to this for so long, this time I won’t be deceived!”

“Ok, I'm so simple, to clarify. By the way, do you know exactly what your goal is?

"And whose else?"

“Well, for example, imposed by your environment.”

"Let go, there's no time."

“Well, look for yourself, I just asked, I care about you. I have a feeling this is not your waythe creator has a different plan for you but it's up to you, of course.

“Aaaaah, how did you get me, I need to move forward, I will definitely succeed, this is a goldmine ...”

“It’s up to you, of course, but it will already be .... the last time you were simply used for their own purposes, I feel sorry for you ...

I have a feeling that yourunning with all your might, but standing still what are you like a boat without oars, which is dragged by the current of the river lower and lower until it runs aground, and there is only musty silt around ... And it will be extremely problematic to get out of there, with each step you will be bogged down in this viscous slurry more and more, until it becomesIt's difficult to breathe.

But it's up to you, of course. I know a way out of this situation, ”the inner voice did not lag behind.

"How do you know him?"

“I am you in the future, who was able to live on, despite the failures, and learnedfind resources for all desiresthat you can only dream of."

What would you do in this situation?

Would you listen to advice or score on this quiet voice that breaks through your swarm of thoughts about how to live on, and the constant need to solve problems right here and now, through problems in relationships, at work, with health ....

Do you have a little time and a modicum of courage to stop, figure out your course, correct it and learn to liftcorrect sailthat will bring you to the shoreyour dreams?

And yes this shore exists . You just haven't been taught how to get to it. And this is not your fault. The temptation is too great to get carried away with another idea of quick money for simple actions. And instead of your dreams, you helped others achieve them.

Seven steps to take your life on a different path

(until she went downhill)

What did I do once to get out of this road thattakes the trolleybus of our life to the depotand puts an end to dreams of a better life.

How to spread your wings and find resources according to your desires - seven steps:

Rejection of illusions. Often in life black line, white, black, white, and then you are already under the tail of a zebra. You can wait for this moment and realize it there (you still have to), or “stop” and take a sober look at what you are doing with your life right here and right now
Accept and love yourself. Yes, yes, you know about it, but what are you doing? Love your body, mind, soul. Your desires and hobbies, which you have long put aside, "for this is stupidity."
How long have you had a day for yourself? Look in the mirror. Do you like this person? You can look at him with your eyes full of love? If not, how do you think he is doing? And how can he help you in this case?
Write down what you are grateful for. Describe all your successes. From early childhood.
By the way, what else are you grateful for - the Creator, the world. Write at least a hundred thanks. Enlightens. He himself once sat and did not know where to start, especially like and for nothing. And then he wrote - 400!
Understand your purpose strengths, which you can manifest in "successful" conditions and in difficult ones. How to insure your weaknesses instead of fighting them (it's easier than you think, and you don't have to go to India to do it).
Take an inventory of your desires and goals that you have been putting off for months, or even years, and understand what is still relevant and what is not, and what is preventing you from achieving them ... Write them out right now

Here right now!

Everything, big and small?

You can start with a list of ten wishes and ten "wants". In one column - desires. In the other - what you do not want. Turn it into a positive plane (if I don’t want it, then I want what?) And add it under the list of ten desires (if they didn’t match).This is what controls your life.

Understand what fears stand in the way of your goal, easily remove them (there is a technique for how to do this quickly and safely) and move on with joy.
Use your skills to expand them to a new level (or new skills) that will allow you to get a different result in your life.
And, understanding your resources (which makes you get out of bed every morning without an alarm clock), every day to perform a feat that serves as your stepping stone and raises every day higher and higher, to results that seemed unattainable just yesterday.

If "horror without end" has already got ...

And this is absolutely true, I described my own doubts just a little more than a year back. I know what it's like to live in a city where the energy itself is against life. The harsh "Stalingrad land" compresses the inner spring so much that it either breaks, and you become another loser. Either you continue to hold on, live on, search, find - and it shoots with the powerful energy that has accumulated in it.

And to surrender or not - it's up to you, not your environment, not anyone else. It's only your choice.

And there are ways to get out from under the tail of a zebra. This road has already been completed, signs and benches have been placed to take a break.

There are even guides (a whole team) ready to lend their shoulder.

And if you are tired of this race and horror without end, if you don’t know how to live on, it’s time to honestly look at yourself and do a business that will bring you a stable income and the gratitude of your customers.

And you can check my words. We can chat in person. Write in the comments.

P.S.Right here and now, write in the comments what was valuable to you in the exercise:

gratitude to yourself;
gratitude to the world;
ten desires and "unwillingnesses";
goal inventory.

And what would you like to know more about.

Guys, we put our soul into the site. Thanks for that
for discovering this beauty. Thanks for the inspiration and goosebumps.
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Do you know the situation when you make a list of promises: learn a language, lose weight, get your dream job, but none of it happens? Psychologists and enlightened ones tell us: we are the masters of our destiny and we need to act, and not wait for a miracle. But how often do we lack a magic pendel to start making dreams come true? This is the most pendel can be called motivation.

site invites you to meet interesting technique planning for the future, where the main motive of your actions is clearly voiced: everything you do, you do for your future self.

1. Picture your realistic future

Do not dwell on dreams and fantasies, but do not fall into the abyss of pessimism. Try to imagine the future as realistic by answering the question: what will life be like if you lead exactly the same lifestyle that you are leading now?

2. Remember that you will be 10 years older

And that you will have to live 10 years less. Don't get upset, this is the reality. It must be remembered that less time for change, and there are more problems that usually accompany a person at a certain age.

3. Remember that problems tend to grow and accumulate.

For example, if quarrels in your family are common, it is foolish to expect that one day your marriage will magic wand will become perfect. Resentments will accumulate nervous system weaken. If you now have occasional stomach pains after a heavy meal, without proper diet in 10 years, the pain will visit you more often and become stronger. Keep this in mind when you present your realistic future.

4. Now imagine a picture of the desired future

For convenience, you can write everything down on paper. Divide the sheet into areas of life that are important to you: health, family, career, finances, self-development, recognition. Think about what you need to do to get what you want. Remember that without action there will be no result, so stick to the basic principles for modeling your future.

5. Choose a long-term investment, not momentary pleasures

What do you think is better: lying on the couch with chips now or a healthy stomach and good physical shape in 10 years? Wasting time and energy on playing with children or cold relationships and rare meetings when will they grow up? The actions we take should benefit us in the future, so as not to torture yourself with the question: why didn’t I do this?

6. Choose the path that's right for you

Carefully analyze your vision of the future. It is important to feel your values and aspirations rather than trying to prove something to others. Is it really what you want Vacation home by the sea or are you satisfied with your apartment in the city? Do you need to become the head of a large company, or do you like the small business that you dreamed about since childhood? Give yourself an honest answer so that your actions are not in vain.

7. Look for the most effective and suitable ways for you, prioritize

Inspirational examples are great. But remember that each of us has our own path. If you've taken care of your body's health but feel uncomfortable going to an expensive gym, try other ways. What is right for you: jogging through the evening streets, wrestling or pool? Look for your way which will bring you maximum benefit in the future.

8. Don't expect instant results, but remember that if you quit, you will never get them.

Your actions will not go unnoticed, they will certainly bear fruit. Maybe hard work will get you promoted only after a couple of years, and recognition of your creative success will overtake you only after 10 years. In any case if nothing is done, the miracle will not happen.

Only we ourselves are responsible for our lives, and in order to find happiness, you need to make an effort, right?