Now you already know everything. I have not hidden any important elements from you.
You can now reap the benefits of centered thinking. There is only a question of programming efficiency so that you can cope with unforeseen, critical, difficult situations and other extremes with the help of the other side. Now we will touch on this topic as well. And in the last chapter we will talk about how to keep the ship of life on the right course guiding it with the firm hand of the Higher Intellect.
There are many more chapters ahead of you, but not in this book, and probably not written by me. We are just beginning to close the gap that has formed between us and our source. As research and experience brings new knowledge, it will spill over into the pages of many books.
Perhaps even they will be taught in schools. Can you imagine the name of the item? "Working with Higher Intellect".
Advances in healthcare allow us to see how quickly we are moving in this direction. Then it should be called ecology.
Politics and diplomacy will, apparently, close the procession.
It is not hard to cite examples of health conferences that scrutinize the available data on the human brain and body in an attempt to piece the puzzle together. One such conference took place in 1988 in Las Vegas, where such distant scientists as German specialists in the treatment of allergies, Russian researchers of negative ions, Eastern psychoneuroimmunologists, experts in African medicinal herbs, doctors practicing traditional Chinese medicine, practicing vibration therapy, homeopathy, acupuncture and bioenergetic therapy. When they put all the pieces of the puzzle together, I wonder if the big picture turns out to be the face of God?
Winston Churchill once said: "People sometimes stumble over the truth, but most of them jump to their feet and hurry on as if nothing had happened." The alpha level is the key to the solution. I cannot understand why the peoples of the world did not discover this panacea for all earthly problems earlier.
Enter the alpha level and connect with the Creator of this planet. What could be easier?
Coping with the loss of a loved one
One of the hardest blows that can befall us is the loss of the person we love. This can be a separation from a lover or spouse, the death of a close friend or family member.
The first thing we lean towards is to feel like a victim or a martyr. When you feel sorry for yourself, you become miserable. Instead, you should be thinking about how to restore your previous fullness to your life.
Change negative thoughts to positive ones.
There is a technique of the Silva Method designed specifically for such situations - the "mirror of the soul".
Don't use force. Do not hurry. But be aware of your thoughts.
This is how you can overcome your grief. When you review your thoughts, you may find them gloomy, negative, useless. The mind is above this, and when it sees itself in the mirror of your consciousness, the desire to change the poles intensifies. This process begins with your desire to give free rein to your mind, then picks up steam with a constructive change in thinking. And victory is achieved when you understand that life must go on.
You are now able to see in which directions you can move.
You can visualize a target in a white-framed mirror. You are also able to channel your thoughts towards the positive aspects of your situation. The Silva Method taught you how to cope better with adversity, allowed you to better know yourself and understand the pain of other people in similar situations. He also helped you grow and become more of the person you should be.
Reread this paragraph again. Put the book aside. Enter alpha and have images of the positive consequences of your loss arise in your imagination. You may also need a positive affirmation to program yourself to gradually emerge from your ordeal.
When it comes to the death of a loved one, you can use these words: "I have the strength to rise above this loss. Every day in all respects I become stronger and stronger and function better and better."
If you want, you can try this phrase: "The past is gone. The future lies ahead. I have the freedom to choose from many opportunities to make my life creative, productive and joyful."
Or something like this: "I am calm, strong and firm. I will survive the loss because I control myself. I am safe, happy and confident in myself."
If the loss is related to separation or breaking off a relationship with a loved one, then you can apply this kind of statement: "If you can do without me, I can do without you too. Every minute that passes after this, closes one door and opens another."
The best assertion is the one you create according to your situation. Your statement should be positive, orderly, and possible. It must be hopeful, focused, and achievable.
Sometimes we take offense at the departure of a person, even at his death. Resentment can weigh heavily on you. Let go of this feeling by going into Alpha and gaining mutual forgiveness. It's never too late to forgive.
How to deal with fear
The loss of a loved one can make your life colorless and the world empty. However, a year later, sadness will remain far behind and life will again be filled with colors. Fear is different. If grief dissolves over time, then fear can only grow stronger. Life provides us with a wide range of fears and anxieties. Generally speaking, we can all fear poverty, failure, loneliness, danger, prejudice, bosses, and so on. In more specific cases, we may develop a tormenting fear of flights, elevators, confined spaces, fear of insects, dirt, darkness, public speaking, heights, dogs. There are more than a hundred common phobias, which have been given the appropriate scientific names.
Fear stifles joy. Anything that deprives us of the joys in life is a serious problem. Here are three steps you need to take to dispel your fears and concerns:
1. Admit it.
2. Understand this.
3. Re-program.
Let's take a look at each of these steps in turn.
1. We tend to wallow in fear, as if it were not fear but a real threat. Relax, face these so-called threats and give them a name. Admit that you are afraid (of cockroaches, prejudice, meeting new people - whatever).
2. To better understand your fear, get to the bottom of its cause. You yourself can be your psychoanalyst by going into the alpha level and asking yourself what is the cause of these negative thoughts. Let your mind wander wherever it pleases. He can bring you back to the time when your Uncle Eddie dipped you in a pond as a child. You thought you were drowning, but it was Uncle Eddie who just taught you to swim. And you have been afraid of water ever since.
3. With understanding, reprogramming already begins. In the example above, your right hemisphere the brain reacts to this understanding by telling you, "We wrote it in the wrong file. Transfer it from survival to memory." You are now ready to change your attitude with positive, affirmative programming. Enter alpha level and give yourself new instructions.
Some of these new instructions are offered below. You can apply one of them directly or adapt to your situation.
Fear of meeting new people. "Meeting new people is fun. I get a lot from meeting them. I am totally relaxed when meeting new people."
Fear of elevators. "I know elevators are safe. I use them with confidence."
Fear of heights. “I focus on the strength and stability of where I stand. Altitude expands my horizons and increases my field of vision.
I find this interesting. I feel comfortable. "
Fear of insects and rodents. "Insects and rodents are afraid of me. I have nothing to fear from them."
Fear of poverty. "I am surrounded by people who care about me.
I will always have everything I need in my life. I have an invisible support. "
Enter alpha once a day, repeating your chosen statement three times until “the problem goes away.
If you need to invent a statement of your own, follow three simple rules:
1. The instructions you give yourself should be positive.
2. State a fact that refutes your fears or in some way undermines their strength.
3. Establish calm self-confidence.
Check to see if the examples above meet these rules.
How to break a vicious circle
If you relax deeply and imagine realistically ...
If you are confident in the Silva Method and know that you are programming successfully ...
If, by solving your problems, you help other people solve their problems ...
If you do not hide ill will, hatred or hostility in your bosom and forgive everyone in your past and present life ...
If you realize the existence of your Higher Self, even dimly, and the existence of the Higher Intellect ...
Then you can overcome all the problems of the physical world. There is no insoluble problem or unattainable goal for you. Many incurable diseases succumb to "miracles". Many deadly enemies become your closest friends. Many seemingly unattainable peaks are conquered in unexpected ways. The problem is forced to retreat, defeated by the intellect, power and love of the other side.
What technique is available to you to solve difficult problems? Here's a quick overview:
Whenever you find yourself in a situation that requires heightened understanding, use the three-finger technique. Programmed in advance: "When I put these three fingers together and meditate on (insert problem), my mind is working on a deeper level of consciousness for the sake of (insert positive)."
In difficult situations that are difficult to figurative thinking, use the glass of water technique.
When you don’t know what technique to use, or don’t imagine what the solution might be, use the dream control technique.
Use subjective communication when solving problems of relationships between people.
In any emergency, use the alpha level (unspecified technique) by instilling positive affirmations in yourself.
Each of these techniques can be performed in critical circumstances in "top gear". Let's go through the list again, pointing out how we can expedite response in an emergency or urgent situation.
"Three Fingers Technique"
... When you program in advance for an event, do it in best time... If you remember, we explained how to determine this time: In the evening before going to bed, enter the alpha level and mentally tell yourself: "I will wake up this night at the best time for self-programming." Fall asleep from alpha. You will wake up at the right time. Return to alpha and do the programming of the three-finger technique. Another way to increase the instantaneous effectiveness of the three-finger technique is through breathing. If you are faced with a critical situation and decide to use this technique to raise your awareness to the level of superconsciousness by putting three fingers together, take a deep breath and hold your breath for a few seconds. Holding your breath triggers a survival response and you start to work harder. high level consciousness.
"The technique of a glass of water". Drop a few drops lemon juice into the water and hold the glass index fingers both hands. Having joined the fingers of both hands, close your eyes and lift them slightly upward, after which, mentally saying: "This is all I need to solve the problem that torments me," sip half a glass. Finish programming in the morning by repeating the same manipulations.
"Dream Management" ... This technique will not show all its effectiveness if you do not memorize all your dreams. Even if you do, you might want to go through the programming of remembering one dream first and then all dreams (see Nights 11 and 16). When you wake up, write down more details of your dreams. And later, when you explore your dreams, one detail may be the golden key you are looking for.
"Subjective connection" ... When you are dealing with serious problems in human relationships, you need to be close to the other side. Alpha subjective communication is good; but subjective communication at the laboratory level is even better. You are closer to the other side.
"Programming at the alpha level". Direct alpha programming can be used to solve problems. If you are programming at the alpha level without using any formulaic technique, you should know how to leverage your programming. Here is some of them:
A serious problem deserves a deeper alpha level. You know how to deepen a level with a countdown. You can also do this by transferring to your favorite place relaxation, which is now also a familiar procedure.
Another way to deepen your level is through progressive relaxation. You remember doing this in the early days of practice - moving from head to toes and relaxing every part of the body. Of course, after these exercises, you can dive even deeper, moving to the laboratory level, if you think you need it.
Once in deep alpha, use three skins.
First, identify the problem by painting a picture in front of you. Then let it change for the better in the second picture, which should be shifted slightly to the left (into the future). Finally, see the goal achieved or the solution found in the third picture, shifted even further to the left. When creating a second image, it is useful to use triggers("with every step forward" or "with every sip of water").
Images are usually sufficient; they express the work of creative energy, they are the "language" of that side. Words can be powerful weapons too if you use persuasive arguments. As we all know, it takes perseverance to overcome difficulties.
When we work to solve problems, our statements must be solid. As John Bunian said, "the one below is not afraid to fall." There is no need to be moderate or beat around the bush when you need help from the other side of the serious matters... I will give some examples of possible statements.
"I expect and predict results. I believe in steady progress, whether I see it or not. My expectations and faith are optimistic."
"I have a burning desire to achieve my goal (to solve my problem). I move forward with energy and zeal. My genius, my enthusiasm and my goodwill will win the support of others."
"Every day I get stronger and more courageous. I see things as they are. I am optimistic about achieving a goal (solving a problem). I work energetically, purposefully and creatively."
How to develop your abilities
Many artists and others creative people improved their abilities and solved career issues using the Silva Method. Let's take another look:
1. At the alpha level, imagine a successful person you would like to emulate.
2. Mentally tell yourself: "Any time I need to know what to do to become better, all I need to do is connect the big, index, and middle fingers on any hand, concentrate on this image, and the answers I get will come from him (from her). "
3. Finish class and get back to work.
4. When difficulty arises, put three fingers together.
Mind solves problems
As this book is being written, a Japanese industrialist is investing $ 80 million to recruit 100 brain scientists. The money will be used to build a 40-acre complex that will host 20 scientists at different times. They will study the brain and such specific problems like aging. One scientist said the project was a unique opportunity "to visualize an actively working brain that - while enclosed in its thick bony membrane - has so far been extremely difficult to explore."
Such a brain study project is undoubtedly of interest. The more we know about the brain, the better. But studying our thought processes through brain research is like studying literature by spelling words. There is more to the thought process than three pounds of brain matter enclosed in a "thick bony membrane."
Intelligence.
There is an energy field that surrounds the brain and actually envelops the entire body. It kind of creates a form for the physical body. What is called an energy field is actually the work of the intellect guiding our cells, organs and systems. The field is located outside the "thick shell of bones" and yet it is part of our general intelligence.
And this is just the beginning.
Add to the energy field other fields of intelligence that we use, and the mind becomes a limitless phenomenon.
Back in the 1940s, Yale University neuroanatomist Harold S. Burr studied energy fields around plants and animals. He found that a baby salamander has an energy field roughly the same shape as the adult animal it will become, and that the axis of this field can be found even in an embryo in an egg. Studying the seedlings, he discovered the existence of the same phenomenon: the energy field around the seedling was shaped like the fields around an adult plant.
Energy is the creative force of the universe. The brain is a physical substance. Therefore, energy is our link with the non-physical world.
Therefore, the mind, and not just the brain, is that mysterious "organ" about which humanity should know more. We need to find out what other energy fields surround a person. We need to learn more about what Dr. Rupert Sheldrake calls morphogenetic fields and what Dr. Peter Russell calls the global brain.
When it comes to solving various life problems, we need to use the brain - both halves of it, which involves more reason in working on the problem, especially the part of it that is connected with the intellect of the other side.
When solving complex life problems, any method by which we get a connection with the Higher Intellect can be applied.
One such way is to use lab-level and advisors. At the laboratory level, we are getting very close to our creative source. The obstacles to creation - which are the real challenges of life - can be removed most effectively at the laboratory level and with the help of counselors who personify the connection to our creative source.
Therefore, apply the lab level and your advisors when programming directly or through subjective communication. What you "see" in your laboratory level manifests itself in the physical world.
In speaking to you about the importance of the laboratory level, I must also remind you of its spiritual nature. They don't go to the president of a corporation to report on the content of newspaper clippings. I suspect that we all define our reputation "at the top" by our ability to take on routine responsibilities.
A person who constantly enters the laboratory level about easily solvable situations that can be dealt with with simple formulaic techniques, from the point of view of the Higher Intelligence, figuratively speaking, simply raises a false alarm.
I would not like to acquire such a reputation from the other side. I suppose you are too. So let's somehow differentiate everyday and really difficult problems - in order to succeed in solving both.
Stop creating difficult problems
Peter A. couldn't hold onto any job. His track record looked great because Peter was able to portray his parade of different jobs as growth and diversity of experience. Therefore, he managed to get a new job quite easily. But one day Peter found a job that he really liked. He didn't want to lose her; she brought him joy and was promising.
Peter had to ask himself: why did he have to change jobs so often? He was trained in the Silva Method, and this increased his authority in his own eyes, but also made him more sensitive to weak points your personality. There was no doubt that Peter was not at ease with the people he had to work with. He was constantly looking for a reason to quarrel.
Peter went into the lab level and asked his advisors, "What should I do about this unpleasant character trait?" He began to ponder this problem and saw himself forgiving his long-dead father. He brushed it off. "What else?" - he asked. There was no answer.
Peter did not quite understand the "physics" of forgiveness, but nevertheless he moved to his favorite place of relaxation and invited his father there. "He looked the way I saw him as a child," Peter recalled. "I forgave him for all the misunderstandings and, in turn, asked for forgiveness from him. We kissed."
Later, Peter entered the lab level again and again asked his advisors what else he could do. This time the answer came: carry out an inventory strengths your character and program more.
Peter wasted no time in following the advice. The more he found in himself positive sides- punctual, honest, neat - the more new features came to his mind. This is a rather long list. Peter then stepped into Alpha with the list in hand and mentally said, “I’ll learn more about strengths your character. As my knowledge of them grows, so do they themselves, and I acquire more and more positive traits. Every day, in all respects, I become more and more victorious. "
Peter was soon promoted to the position of manager of the firm.
Negative personality traits act as a source of difficult problems.
It seems that our universe is positive and in order to be successful in it, you must practice an equally positive approach to life.
To program the elimination of an unwanted trait, do the following:
1. Identify the negative trait.
2. At the alpha level, look for the root cause and let your mind rumble in the past.
3. In the alpha state, mentally say: "I am erasing feelings (of a negative trait). They are a product of (a cause) that no longer matters to me. Instead, I feel (the opposite)."
Some examples of such opposites are: hate-love, dissatisfaction-contentment, inadequacy-self-esteem, despondency-enthusiasm, insecurity-confidence.
If difficult problem is created by your behavior, not a personality trait, change the wording accordingly. Then apply at the alpha level the following statement that will reinforce a positive change: "I am ready to drop this (behavior). I no longer need it. I am free to be myself. This path opens up new levels of joy for me and my companions."
There is no life without difficulties. Sooner or later, they come to visit everyone. Want to know how others deal with them? ...
Theme life difficulties one parable best reveals.
One day, a disciple who had experienced frustration in life came to his spiritual master and asked:
“Teacher, I'm so tired of life difficulties... I have such a hard life, such difficulties and problems that I have to swim against the tide all the time. My strength is just running out - a little more and I will give up ... What should I do? "
After a little thought, the teacher decided not to rush to answer. He took three identical containers of water and put them on the fire. He put carrots in one container, put an egg in another, and poured coffee beans in a third. After a while, the spiritual master took out the carrots and the egg from the water, and poured coffee from the third container into a cup.
"What do you think has changed?" - asked the teacher of his student
"The most pure water happens in those sources
in which she breaks through obstacles, overcoming difficulties. "
M. Norbekov
“The egg and carrots were boiled, and the coffee beans were dissolved in the water,” followed the student's answer.
“You are right,” said the spiritual master, “But this is only a very superficial view of what happened. Take a closer look ...
You see, previously hard carrots, having been in boiling water, or life difficulties, became soft and pliable. What happened to the egg? Naturally fragile and liquid, the egg has acquired hardness.
What is most interesting is that outwardly, neither carrots nor eggs have changed at all, changes have affected only their inner nature, properties and qualities under the influence of equally unfavorable circumstances - boiling water. The same is true for people themselves - outwardly strong and strong people under the influence of life's difficulties can completely unstuck and become weaklings, while fragile and delicate people under the same conditions, having passed hardening, only get stronger, having acquired the qualities of stamina and willpower. "
"The meaning of life is not to wait for the storm to end, but to learn to dance in the rain."
Vivian Green
"What about the coffee?" - the student was curious
" O! This is the fun part! Coffee beans have completely dissolved in a new hostile environment and, what is very important, they have completely changed it, turning ordinary boiling water into something new - into a fragrant drink. "
Such people are very rare. Getting into life difficulties, they use them not only for self-improvement and development of their character traits, but at the same time they create something new and beautiful. Such people lose nothing in power. difficult circumstances- they transform the very environment in which they are, into something new and beautiful, gaining benefit and knowledge not only for themselves, but also for those around them. "
“Free yourself from the hope that the sea will ever calm down. We must learn to sail in strong winds. "
Aristotle
This article will focus on the problems in human life and how to solve these problems.
Of course, problems exist in the life of every person: these are material problems, health problems, loneliness and many others. All the difficulties of the dualistic and material world exist so that a person develops and does not stand still.Even when it seems to a person that he is developing, improving and studying in theological schools, it is the emergence of real problems in his life that makes it possible to understand what he has achieved in his development and how easily he can solve his life problems.
Problems in a person's life
In essence, all difficulties and problems in life are not given to a person so that he may suffer and suffer. A person goes through certain lessons on planet Earth, and each lesson has its own value, because nothing arises just like that.
A person develops through his problems, and all obstacles, like a mirror, reflect the inner imperfection of the person himself. And this is an opportunity to make the inner world cleaner, more perfect.
When a person solves his problem in the right way, his life changes, and this problem will not happen again. And this can be called the healing of your Soul.
No one from Above wants suffering and problems for a person, because such problems and difficult life situations consider limited human thinking, built on the ego and serving it, to be his suffering.
In fact, it was the Soul that created a person with his body, consciousness, personality and ego for its tasks and its evolution. So that a person develops and becomes closer to God, to Light and Love.
Problems and difficulties in a person's life indicate that he needs to change. And this is not suffering, but a gift that allows you to go beyond the framework of ordinary human thinking, beyond the framework of the three-dimensional dual world.
Having solved his problems in a positive way, on analysis, in Love, a person connects with his Soul, and such a person no longer looks for easy ways, abandoning his families, does not go into alcoholism and drugs. All you need is to perceive life as it is and look for the causes of problems within yourself. Thus, problems in a person's life force him to move forward, and solving his problems makes us better.
How to solve problems in your life
Sooner or later, most people are faced with the question: "How to solve problems in your life?"
It quite often happens that negative situations, quarrels and misunderstandings arise in families. And sometimes a person even wants to give up everything and leave such a family.
In fact, you cannot escape fate, besides, other family members simply help such a person to see their imperfections, inner fears, resentments, disharmony that need to be cleared and worked out.
Close people do not really want pain and suffering. to a loved one, and therefore should not be offended by the words and actions of other family members. You need to look into yourself, find your inner pain, what causes irritation, and heal your inner problems.Having healed his inner pain, a person will stop attracting such problems, hurtful words and family conflicts to himself. If the inner world is clean and full unconditional love, a person is no longer interested in playing the illusion of this world: conflicts, quarrels, scandals, and they will not be attracted into the life of such a person.
The main problem in people's lives is not the problems themselves, but attachment to them, attachment to their desires and attachment to the joys of worldly desires.
Already the very birth in this world is a problem, because everything ends and collapses. Many desires are not fulfilled, and sometimes you have to lose what you have.
Separation, sickness, old age, death ... This world is impermanent and is suffering. This is the truth of this imperfect world. When a person has desires and he receives joy from desires, then by itself attachment to such desires arises and suffering arises. When a person is not attached to his desires, not attached to this world, then there are practically no problems.
Even if there is a seemingly insoluble situation and there is no relief, most likely the solution to such a problem is beyond the bounds of human consciousness. How to solve the problems that arise in life?
Probably, it is worth letting go of such a situation and giving it to the Creator with the words: "Dear God, I did everything I could in this situation, but nothing has changed, so please take this situation and resolve it."
In a person's life there may be serious illnesses and difficult life situations. Therefore, there is such a thing as humility, and this is the most powerful mechanism of purification.
Humility has always been revered as holy people, and they became holy through humility. When a person humbles himself, he leaves the Creator or God himself to decide life situations and to purify the person.
It is necessary to agree that it is sometimes difficult for a person with his narrow view of life to even live, what to say about solving any problems. Humility and repentance are the first steps of trusting your life to God and these are the first steps of striving towards God. When a person is aspiring to God, his desires and problems diminish, and the suffering of this world is hardly perceived.
In essence, suffering and problems arose when a person alienated himself from his Soul, from God, who inside him began to serve his personality, his ego. There is freedom of choice, but God's Choice is always Light, it is following.
If a person chooses his life path himself, regardless of the choice of his Soul, the choice of God, then he will have a journey through the worlds of illusion, through the worlds of suffering and all kinds of problems - this is separation from the Creator, God.
A person is constantly chasing after the illusory things of this material world, but the main treasure is this, this is God, and this is the true and indestructible state of the essence of each person. And therefore, each person can entrust his choice to God and become his choice.
Holy people or hermits stopped choosing in their lives, completely trusting in the choice of God. And everyone can do it. It is not at all necessary to become a hermit to answer the question of how to solve problems in your life.When a person is aspiring to God, he ceases to think with ordinary human thinking, and ceases to evaluate in his life. What does it mean not to evaluate? This means that suffering and problems do not affect such a person - there is no longer the concept of the absence of something and there is no comparison of oneself with someone or something.
This is the communion of oneself with God, a return to God. In this world, a person lives in his own illusions, experiences many problems, sufferings and misfortunes, not realizing that this is only a dream. When a person trusts in God's choice, much becomes clear, problems disappear, and true meaning is acquired.
Conclusion
Problems in a person's life show that he must change. Problems simply indicate the imperfection of a person, his inner peace... The Creator wants each person to develop and therefore the various problems that arise in the process of life are a kind of gifts through which everyone must realize their Unity with the world and God.
But it also happens that two (sometimes mutually exclusive) solutions suggest themselves, that is, a dilemma arises, which can be difficult to resolve, since both solutions do not suit a person, and sometimes the dilemma seems generally insoluble. Famous model Such a problem can be a dilemma called "Buridan's donkey", when the donkey died of hunger, unable to choose one of two completely identical haystacks, any one (apparently, the donkey was not quite normal, or ate something).
In such life situations, especially when there is a lack of time, they often make wrong or erroneous decisions, which leads to negative consequences both for the person himself and for the persons in contact with him - home, colleagues, passers-by, etc. Therefore, the solution of the dilemmas that have arisen should be approached seriously and thoughtfully, and you should not close your eyes to them, no matter how much you want to - decide still have to. The very concept of "dilemma" is defined in different ways depending on which area it belongs to.
In logic, a dilemma is a judgment or inference containing two mutually exclusive positions, from which one must be chosen. Or is it a situation in which the choice of two opposite possibilities is equally difficult. Since people when solving difficult life situations or problems usually act on the basis of inherent moral and ethical rules, then the resulting dilemma becomes a problematic situation for them, the way out of which involves two mutually exclusive solutions, both of which are not impeccable from a moral or ethical point of view. People with a pro-Western mindset would say that it is necessary to make a choice between two values (material, moral, ethical, etc.), each of which is equally important.
Dilemmas, in contrast to ordinary everyday problems, cannot, as a rule, be completely resolved; rather, more or less effective approaches can be applied to them. The dilemma can become even more difficult if you try to solve it as an ordinary everyday problem, relying only on a personal, often biased, opinion (remember where the desire to destroy horseradish in the garden led the humorist Evdokimov's neighbor?). If a person solves it in advance, without making even minimal efforts (well, I don’t want to strain his brains!), This can lead to denial of the difficulty that has arisen (close our eyes to everything: maybe it will somehow resolve itself), the difficulty will not be eliminated , and further actions will probably be wrong (here everyone can remember a lot of examples).
If a dilemma arose in people's relations with the surrounding material world (a pipe burst - fix it yourself or call a locksmith; broke Washer- send for repair or buy a new one; a car stopped on the way - try to fix it yourself or call a tow truck; etc., etc.), then it is usually solved by the combined actions of people directed in one direction.
But in relationships between people ("interpersonal relationships", as psychologists say), the solution to dilemmas can be more difficult. The fact is that the cause of such a dilemma is usually a psychological conflict, unconscious or conscious. A person who finds himself in the conditions of a choice between two inherent moral or ethical values is forced to experience a moral conflict, from which a way out must be found. A dilemma can arise not only because of the contradiction between values (both internal and external), but also between the goal and the means, value and norm, norm and ideal, duty and value, emotions and beliefs, desires and conscience, etc. e. There are two possibilities to resolve a dilemma in the form of a moral or ethical conflict: 1. Choosing a certain line of behavior. 2. Choice of action (what to do; what to do?).
An ordinary, normal person is characterized by a desire first of all to avoid solving complex dilemmas associated with interpersonal relationships(because of the unwillingness to disturb the inner peace, "to flutter your nerves"). Therefore, many usually do what immediately comes to mind: looking for a compromise; shy away from making a decision; replace meaningful reasoning with examples "from life", their own and others (that is, a decision by analogy or precedent); attract various examples to strengthen your pre-occupied position. Well, and if all this did not help and the problem has to be solved, everyday means are used: to separate both choices in time (for example: to accept the murderer of a brother according to custom, as a guest, and then kill him outside the village); choose the lesser of two evils, guided by your own hierarchy of values or norms; achieve a "good" goal by "evil" means, excluding unconditional evil - murder, physical attack, violence, etc.
Unfortunately, theoretically it is very difficult to formulate rules or methods for solving life dilemmas, since there are a lot of them, and they are all different, and people are all different, each with its own system of values, views and rules developed for life path... There is one more difficulty. It happens that it is irresistible: people tend to justify any of their own actions, convincing themselves that there is nothing terrible here; I am acting in the interests of my organization or in pursuance of some higher goals; the bosses will support me; and so on. Well, for those who still want to objectively understand the dilemma and try to resolve it, we can offer a series of sequential steps, stages or actions:
1. Recognize and understand the dilemma, formulate it for yourself.
2. Explore all the possible facts about the dilemma.
3. List, except for two obvious ones, all the other possible options solving the problem that caused the dilemma.
4. List the facts or arguments supporting each of the decisions.
5. Test each of the solutions by asking questions:
This is right?
This is useful?
It is legal?
Is it moral?
Is it ethical?
6. Outline and choose a solution.
7. Double check your chosen solution by asking two questions:
How will I feel when my family finds out about my decision?
How will I feel when the public (neighbors, colleagues, residents settlement etc.) find out about my decision?
8. Justify the decision by listing the positive reasons for its implementation.
9. Identify, formulate the most serious objections to the adopted decision and find answers to them.
10. Realize the price, or the downside, the decision what harm it can do (or, as they say, is the game worth the candle?).
Of course, when solving simple life situations, few will strain so much. But there are dilemmas that are worth pondering over. I wish all SJ readers to avoid difficult life problems, and may your life flow easily and joyfully. And I wish women that they had someone to solve such problems, and only joy, love and happiness remained for the lot of beautiful ladies! Moreover, it's spring!
Hello, friends!
Life difficulties happen to all of us. Life is so beautiful and interesting because it does not look like a monotonous flat road with the same landscape along the entire route. Agree, living such a life would be extremely boring! But, of course, few people think about it at the moment when difficulties come directly into his life. But in vain!
Today, my friends, we will just talk about why life's difficulties are given to us and how to treat them correctly.
How to deal with difficulties?
Probably each of you can remember those moments of your life when suddenly "like snow on your head" some difficulties fell on your head. Hardly anyone experiences such moments. Rather, completely different shades of feelings prevail in your mood - from irritation to anger and bewilderment. Still, after all, no one likes it when some unforeseen, and even not very pleasant circumstances interfere with his plans! And I really want to react to them negatively. But this just does not need to be done in any case!
The first thing you need to remember at the moment when, as you expected, is that everything in life happens to us for a reason. And if the Universe has given you some life circumstances, then they are for 
you some kind of usefulness. But this is only if you react to them correctly. Remember, in I wrote that at every fork in your life path (that is, every time you decide how to think and act further) you choose for yourself where to turn - To your Goal or FROM it. And the choice of direction depends not on a specific decision of what exactly should be done and how, etc., but only on your ATTITUDE! If you are POSITIVE and have a POSITIVE attitude, then whatever further step you take, it will bring you closer to the Goal (and therefore improve your life). And if you are negatively disposed, then ANY of your decisions will lead you away from the Goal and worsen your life as a whole.
Many people manage to ruin their own lives even when everything is generally good for them! Surely you have heard from someone such words as "If everything is good now, it will soon be bad!" etc. If you have such beliefs, get rid of them as soon as possible! Because that is how people and, which is then perceived as "the prophecy came true, so everything became bad!" And this was just their own request, which they sent to the Universe, expecting (and therefore attracting!) Trouble, was fulfilled.
If your life is now easy, good and gives you only positive, !!! This 
you will consolidate what is now, making it clear to the Universe that you LIKE what is happening to you at the moment, which means that you need to give the same and more! And make it a rule to repeat as often as possible this absolutely wonderful and very effective: "Everything is fine with me, and it is getting even better !!!" Make it your motto, write it on a piece of paper and hang it over your desk, or make it a screensaver on your computer or phone. You have no idea how powerful this affirmation works! Try it, you won't regret it!
Why are life difficulties given to us?
Well, what to do if just now your life is not at all easy, but on the contrary, difficulties have piled up on full program? But rejoice! No, I'm not making fun of you! I seriously recommend that you use one more powerful setting: "Everything that happens in my life is for the better!" And only with this attitude, you begin to figure out why this or that difficulty has come into your life.
Any difficulty that appears in your life is a kind of message to you from the Universe. It may be - perhaps you need to turn the other way, consider some new options, and not get hung up on one thing. At the same time, you will have the impression that you are not allowed into the “door” where you are so persistently trying to get through. In this case, be sure to “look around”, that is, try to find and think about other options for solving the problem. Most likely, it is among them that you will find not just acceptable, but the best.
Difficulty can be given to you to gain a certain experience that will be useful to you at the next stages of your life path. By the way, if this is the case, then these difficulties are quite easily overcome, and you are constantly given hints and help so that you can cope with the task as quickly and easily as possible. Therefore, notice all these circumstances - this will help you figure out why you need this difficulty - as a springboard for gaining experience, or as a "road sign".
The most important thing that you must understand for yourself, no difficulties and troubles are given to a person in order to "punish" him! The universe does not punish anyone for anything. People attract all negative circumstances to themselves, with their thoughts.
I would even advise you not to call difficulties difficulties. Better to label them as "tasks to be solved" or "circumstances for gaining experience." Such formulations set you up on a subconscious level not for a hard struggle with difficulties, but for productive actions. And this is very important.
So, what can we conclude. 
Any difficulties you meet on the path of life should be treated calmly first of all. And also positively, as something that is designed to help you make the best decision in the given circumstances, or to get the necessary and useful experience. In the end, the process of solving problems and overcoming difficulties makes us stronger and more experienced and allows us to feel the joy of victories more vividly!
Let me remind you of another one of my favorites wise phrases: "If it's hard for you, rejoice - then you are going up!"
Your Ekaterina :))
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